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Wednesday

White Pornography on the Black Mind

Have you ever considered the sheer number of sexy movies with unclothed white women and men that the African American community watches?  Is it any wonder why black men and women are open to experiencing sex with non-blacks--many have been programmed to?

Consider how television programming, print programming, parental programming, church programming, etc. moves one to watch subject matter that is really meant to be shared between couples privately.  These racy images appear before covetous eyes.  It wasn't good enough to watch non-blacks have the best of this thing or that thing before the black man or woman would slave to have the same, but what some don't say is how much they wish for a relationship and sex that looks like non-black couples.  Therefore, they watch porn, read the erotic books or how-to manuals, and do other things certain ethnicities do in the hopes that their relationships can be just as good, if not more, while ignoring the sheer number of non-blacks who divorce, contract sexual diseases, and have mental disturbances as a result of immoral acts.  The truth is anything that is abused or misused will break people down emotionally and physically.  So while George thinks that trying this new thing and that one he saw on a porno will help his love life, he just might be secretly wishing for his black Mary to be white and vice versa. 

Maybe your elders warned you about acting like the Jones' but then again maybe not.  The Jones was a fictious family that lived in the neighborhood and seem to have everything:  fancy car, house and pool, designer wardrobe, kids in private school, etc. while everyone else in the neighborhood had been living paycheck to paycheck.  The poor folks could barely keep their house, much less, maintain it.  Trying to live like the Jones family, doing what they do, simply keeps you unfulfilled, frustrated, and wishing for things that aren't necessarily meant for you due to any number of factors.  So if you wish to have a relationship and sex like the Jones', you might be one of those who feel miserable while hoping to run into the arms of someone non-black.

It may have been nothing more than a distraction, a marketing ploy, or something sinster, but when one finds these adult movies keeping families entertained (or shocked) with semi-nude or nude people performing seductive scenes/sexual acts on TV and elsewhere, you can't help but wonder how does it all impact one's mind especially when a particular ethnicity dominates the industry.

It would make sense why some would work hard to reign supreme, so to speak, when there are so many stereotypes of who has the bigger whatever and who can do magical things with a tongue.  There is a wish, for some, to have what mama and daddy warned them about.

Let us think with an open mind for a moment, removing prejudice thoughts and anger in the process, if a little black boy just so happens to come across nude (or partially nude) images of white women on TV and off for years, wouldn't the images imprint his mind?  Wouldn't he be curious about those that don't look like his mama?  He just might fantasize about one day "hooking up" or marrying what he has seen privately--depending on his personal preference.  Could it be that the repeated subsconscious programming/conditioning from childhood of white nudity would have such an impact on black men/women that they find themselves in the arms of white people later in life?  The same could be said if a white boy had been exposed to naked black women or an Asian, Italian etc.  Uncovered body parts (on any attractive woman) do stimulate sexual desire and if seen over and over again with certain skin colors might make the person want to experience something other than what he or she is use to seeing. 

How does white porn impact a black mind especially one who claims to be spiritual?  One might ponder that an ethnicity that considers itself supreme would market themselves as something to be desired ie.) beautiful, sexy, smart, fun, and kinky.  And one might reason, "Well, you know my God would only want me to be with the best."  So off the black man or woman goes in search of "the best" only to find out he or she is constantly taking a test on intelligence, trust, finances, love, etc.   Becoming increasingly frustrated with being tested by non-blacks, the black man or woman just might find his or her way back home (at least temporarily), but fantasy is hard to shake and the longing to be anywhere, but in familiar territory will make him or her want to run again especially if old, bad childhood memories should resurface.

Now what if a black man's personal dating preference was shaped due to what he didn't like about his own ethnicity, upbringing and the like?  What if those closest to him put off their personal views on him by saying, "black is ignorant, unclassy, rude, ugly, dirty, and ghetto?"  The poor, brainwashed boy turned man will assume that what he has viewed over the years with non-blacks is the way to go, "The white people treat me better...look at how they have sex...I wish I could be with someone who makes me feel good about me..."  Unfortunately, many black folks, like other ethnicities, have experienced much negativity within their own families.   

Porn is for some black men, their escape, a sexual training ground, and an opportunity to view one's fantasy until they can experience reality on a stripper pole or in their bedrooms.  A black man might permit his mind to enter a dark world void of spiritual light where only the sounds of love-making and visions of nudity plague the mind.  He is secretly jealous because his body doesn't look like the actor. He is bitter because he can't seem to attract any woman that looks like the ones in his movie collection.  He might falsely assume that "they" are better than him in the way that they love, have sex, etc.

The porn addict will allow his flesh to override his spirit therefore becoming entrapped in mind and body--no good to anyone, not even himself.  For some men, even the act of sex just doesn't work or feel right.  How can a black man build a masterful world when it is governed by what the world calls, "white supremacy" even in white porn.  He thinks that he has won something by capturing what is paraded in front of him and will quite possibly marry his sexual fantasy only to be dominated later by her while wishing to be in control when he is not.  He needs his escape, so he asks himself, "Now where is my porn stash?"  While his lover asks, "Now where is the cash?"     

The idea of watching someone non-black nude is exciting for the boy-man and so he sees nothing wrong with what he does.  He will defend his actions, reason that porn (in general) is okay, encourage his partner(s) to join, and do whatever his flesh orders him to do while feeling empty inside--never satisfied.

I caution parents about letting their children view television and movies meant for adults and I talk to my own about what they see and hear, but it is inevitable that at some point one's child is going to see someone nude that isn't his or her skin color.  The images might stick with him or her for a lifetime.  Depending on what they see those nude bodies doing and how long the child sees it, just might impact his or her future decisions when it comes to relationships.  

Nicholl McGuire

Note: Read more about how pornography affects erections, intimacy with a partner, and in young people sexual development.  How Porn Is Ruining Sex Lives http://on-msn.com/LOZhxo via @msnliving
 

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