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This site was created by Nicholl McGuire, Inspirational Speaker and Author. Feel free to comment, share links and subscribe. If you have a business or would like to guest post feel free to contact. Check out topics on this blog and select what interests you. They are found at the bottom of this page. Peace and Love.


Make Up in Your Mind to Be Happy

Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Make Up in Your Mind to Be Happy: You are free to be happy!  Tell yourself that today!  "I am free to be happy!" You are free to do what you want, when you want...




When They Tell Me I'm an African American, Black

Why be offended when "they" identify you as "black"or "African American"?  Why dislike those who put a label on you or place you in a "your type" box?  If that is how "they" define you, and you consider yourself to be different, then there just might be a disagreement.  One who is not fearful of labels, criticisms, etc. will and needs to stand up for his or herself.

I find some African Americans suffer with various personality disorders, because for far too long they have been passive about sharing how they really feel to "they."  These non-blacks, who are at times ill-equipped, to converse with African Americans say the wrong things and do wrong, because no one has bothered to educate some on what are considered minor and major offenses in the black community.  The reaction to being described as "black or African American" varies.  Some of our people could care less about descriptions just don't call them out of their names.  Others find assumptions are offensive when they have one parent who is not African American and the other is. Then you have those blacks or African Americans who are listening real closely how you talk about them.  Is it really necessary to mention that someone in a story was black or African American while other individuals in the same story are not described as being white or otherwise?

Some of us get told we are "too sensitive" because we let what others say about us get under our skin. Being called black, African American bi-racial, or something else, depending on who you speak to, is good, bad or otherwise to them, but doesn't represent the majority even if they look black.  This is why it is always best to keep one's personal observation to his or herself until the opportunity comes to discuss one's ethnicity.  We don't have to embrace descriptions just because someone tells us we should.  You have the privilege of being yourself whatever you define yourself to be.

I think of those men and women who either spit out "blaaack" or hesitate when they say, "African-American" and I can't help but feel a sense of sadness.  It is obvious from their reaction that they are grappling with some deep emotions.  Something or someone made them feel badly about saying what they are.  They discovered something about the labels that left them with a bad taste in their mouths. Others just wanted to stop with all the labels.  All are right in how they feel.

When one, who isn't you, says what they think you are, you can nod in agreement, correct them, educate, or ignore that person, your choice.  But what we need to think twice about doing is going along just to get along when we feel differently.  Of course, there will be critics and others who will tell you what to say, how to think, and what to do, but you are in control of you!

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7


7 Tips on Escaping Mindless Mind Control from Media...

Truth Revealed: Celebrities, Entertainment Industry, Society: 7 Tips on Escaping Mindless Mind Control from Medi...: An image flashes quickly on a screen, words scroll at the bottom of a screen, some annoying chatter is ongoing while music plays in the bac...


Dealing With the Liars in Your Life! by Sheila Robinson-Kiss

Would You Change if You Were Repeatedly Told How Ugly, Black, Ghetto...You Were?

Let's face it some people just don't like black folks.  Whether you are bi-racial, from the mother land, or raised in America, there are just things about you that non-blacks or maybe even your own people just don't like about you.  So what are haters going to do?  They will pick on you or use people you know to bully you into conforming into what they want you to be.  These children of darkness are going to tell you in so many ways how they don't like your attitude, your hair, the way you look, how you talk, your interests, and who you know.  These controlling individuals are going to build alliances with people who look like you to advise you about things like:  how you need to stay away from certain black folks, how this one and that one is trouble, play dumb about what you know, don't go over there, don't sit here, and more.  Meanwhile, what is all the controlling tactics and negative propaganda doing to your psyche?  You doubt yourself.  You assume the worse from people.  You are paranoid, secretive, worried, fearful, and can't connect to anyone spiritually, mentally, or physically outside your little circle.  The older you get, the smaller your circle.  Sooner or later people will pick up on your "issues" and move on.

From what you look like to where you choose to live, those who don't want your kind (gender/sexuality/skin tone/title/membership/culture/social class) around will have difficulty with you.  You will need to change your appearance, the way you talk, walk, and whatever else if you want to be accepted into certain circles.  Some gullible types still don't believe that it is who you know that gets you "in" and puts others out.  The world around us is filled with symbolism that tells us who is in with who and what you need to do to get favor with this person and that one.  Sleep with the right person, connect with the right group, say the right prayers at the right church, pay the right amount of get the picture.

Those who are labeled with one of those self-hate sort of titles (merely labeled hate perpetuated by non-blacks), are not fit to be around certain people, places and things.  Once you start wearing titles deemed by some groups like:  cool but nasty, crazy but nice, black but fat, good worker but bad attitude, sexy but disloyal, smart but a drunk, etc. then they will take what they know about you and mold you into what they want you to be.  Before long, you are walking and talking in a suit that is not you!  You are confident and financially secure--not.  Intelligent and fun--not really.  Sweet and friendly--that's a joke.  You get the point.  Fake it until you make it, you were most likely advised. Yet, many are still living lies while many more are believing the labels their toxic masters/teachers/parents/siblings/spouses/partners gave them until they rise above them.

"Ugly, blaaaack and ghetto" are popular descriptions used to make some black folks behave and feel inferior.  No one wants to be called these things especially in a mean-spirited tone and from your own people.  But too often, these adjectives are used to describe some you know and those you don't.  You may have called a relative or friend one or more stereotypical names.  The more some African Americans are called names, the worse they act!  Whoever thought that using some kind of reverse psychology to get our people to conform by using negative words, lacked wisdom.  Those of us who have been called all sorts of ugly names growing up suffered much like:  our self-esteem was chipped away at, personal relationships were difficult to get in and stay in, and other issues occurred that didn't build us up.

Sure, you might look good in a nice dress or suit but up under those layers is a broken spirit that needs healing.  People bombarding you or others with ugly names, whether joking or not, is not going to do anything more than harden your heart to love.

Love of self, community, family and more comes alive when we know the truth, defend the righteousness of who we are, and treat others well during the process.  Tell someone, "I love you" today.

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.  


No Love for the Children? When Some Black Mothers Go Off

You have heard the stories of mothers killing their own children.  It seems in each story, no one noticed any signs or discovered anything a bit strange leading up to the incidents.  But I personally believe that some family members and friends knew these mothers were unstable before the murders took place.

Having been around mothers and grandmothers who had the following issues: tough childbirths, challenging menstrual cycles and menopause, many children living in the home, a history of parenting siblings at young ages, and a negative attitude when it came to being around children, I could see why some new mothers and veteran ones got away with hurting children.  These emotionally beaten mothers were too tired, impatient, broke, busted, disgusted, and more to care too much about what was going on with other mothers in the community.  Some responded when told about a depressed daughter, post-partum relative, menopausal mother, etc., "That's her business...I got enough problems of my own.  She wanted them d*mn kids, what did she expect?  I ain't got no time to be watching someone else's kids!"  One told me when I mentioned a past story about a mother murdering her kids, "That's so sad, some of these women need to close their don't make sense!"  The keep-it-real type will not empathize about a troubled mother's state of mind.  Some critics will not look at the fact that some relatives and friends have mental issues and may not know that they have them.  How is Crazy supposed to take care of Crazy?

Sometimes the writing on the wall doesn't show up with some mothers and their children until years later.  It isn't until something bad happens that folks will say things like, "I thought she was a little crazy.  I wondered where the father was and why she had to do so much by herself...There was something not quite right with that one..."  Well if one suspected all of this, then why didn't he or she bother to reach out and help?  Why didn't the know-it-all witness make some phone calls and send some assistance to that address?

Not every child will keep their mouths closed about a mother's gradual mental and/or physical breakdown.  Some will share details about what they see, hear, and feel concerning their mothers, but are relatives and friends really listening?  Do they even care about what is happening or more concerned about how someone else's issues might inconvenience them?  Some loved ones might confront the mother, yet the meeting turns from good to bad in an instant, because quite frankly there are those black folks that just don't know how to be loving and kind toward one another.  They are quick-tempered, rude and insensitive.  Therefore, much attention is placed on whether the atmosphere is clean, organized and children fed, meanwhile no one sees the crazed look in a mother's eye that can't take another day in a miserable relationship, parenting unruly children, and counting money that isn't there in an attempt to pay bills.

So how do you know when a mother is ready to go off and do something crazy?  You have to be observant and listen to what she is saying about herself, children, partner, job, etc.  If some are too busy running their mouths about what a mother should and shouldn't do, you will overlook the signs.

1.  Did she use to keep the house clean but no longer does it?
2.  Did she threaten to hurt herself, children or partner?
3.  Does she own a gun or a weapon that she periodically talks about using but then covers up what she has said with statements like, "I'm just joking...You know I wouldn't hurt those kids or their daddy..."
4.  Does she frequently leave young children home while she goes out to party, hang out over a friend's house, do drugs, shop, etc.?
5.  Do you often get the feeling that something bad might happen?
6.  Does she have bruises, scratches, bites, and other markings on her body?
7.  Does she cry, complain, or curse often about her partner and/or children?
8.  Do you find yourself having to keep secrets about bad things she has done to the children?
9.  Is there someone in the home (other than the mother) that has a known track record of being verbally and physically abusive to the family?  Has she said anything about paying this person back for all he/she has done?
10.  Have you noticed how she handles her children or looks at them?  Does it creep you out or make you feel uneasy?

Notice patterns in one's behavior before jumping to conclusions.  Do your homework when it comes to personality disorders, known health issues, and other things that might run in the family.  Never assume that children are safe when they are often crying, complaining about pain, clinging on to someone who is not the parent, and refusing to go home especially after they have gotten in trouble about something.  Chances are there will be severe punishment awaiting them at home.

Take the time out to pay attention to those around you, pray for them and offer your service when you can.  Sometimes the issue might be as small as helping a mother with a bill or as big as needing to be separated from children for awhile.  But whatever the case, don't ignore the signs!  Save not only a child's life, but mothers too!
Nicholl McGuire author of When Mothers Cry, see blog here.  Check out audio/video messages on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.


What's Right with Being African American in the Community, Workplace?

Oftentimes we dissect ourselves in circles and mention much about what's wrong with us.  However, there is a lot that is right with us and others benefit much from our strengths and weaknesses.  Look around and you can see the impact that African Americans have made for decades from music to sports.  Those, on the outside looking in on our circles, always find a way to monetarily benefit, get some kind of name recognition, and more.  If we saw ourselves in the way that others saw us, then maybe many of us would be millionaires!

As we know, not every non-black has personal prejudices toward African Americans, but what some do have is a curiosity, a compassion, and a hunger for the truth.  The kind of truth that wasn't given to them by parents and grandparents about blacks.  "Why is it that black people say...Why do they react to...What is it about African Americans that they do...," these non-blacks ask us.  Then some knowledgeable black person will try to answer the questions for the rest of us.  Sometimes this works, but other times it doesn't since there really isn't a "one size fits all" kind of belief within the black community.  Just when you think you know something, you don't know anything about black!

Being that we all come in different shades, we also come from different backgrounds, and have interesting views about us and others.  But many of our people have been brainwashed through various media to prefer one issue over another, to act in ways that often keep us back rather than push us forward and eventually cause further harm to our self-esteem.  Than God for those who wake the community up and say, "Don't you see what is happening?  Do you see how they are using your own people against you?  Do you see the sell-outs?  Why do you want to be a part of that group?" 

The goodness of being black is knowing that you can rise above almost anything!  When you know your family history and the struggles they have undergone just trying to survive in communities, workplaces, families, and other places, you will say and do things that will make people re-evaluate their stereotypical mindset, "Wow, I didn't know you were as intelligent as you are.  I didn't know you had that kind of skill.  I thought that most blacks were..."  What's right about being black is when we do what's right!

African Americans determined to come up higher for self first is something worth mentioning in this piece, because if there is no love for self, there is no love for community.  These people are mentally strong, have big ideas, have coordinated the plans to get things done, and don't quit until they have made an evergreen impact.  They are built to withstand opposition and fight to do what's right.  Sometimes the only true enemy is the enemy of self!  There are those who self-destruct because they are ill-equipped to handle the tasks presented before them while pretending to be something they are not.  They have inflated egos and so there prideful ways cause them to get into much trouble with people who could have been great allies.

It doesn't take much to live a righteous life.  If one leaves his or her negative past behind and chooses to live honestly while genuinely loving others, he or she will at least get his or her foot in a door that is divinely chosen for him or her.  But if one wants to lie his or her way into establishments while using people, places and things to propel him or her in devious ways, then the individual will surely fall sooner or later.  Sometimes doing wrong appears like it's doing right when in all actuality it is what it is--wrong.  The twisting of truth and the support of misdeeds is what keeps the false teachers, preachers, mentors, and others in business.  Meanwhile, deceivers make promises to help a handful at the expense of the majority.  The so-called "favorites" have no clue in some of these well-established circles that they are merely snitches, servants, slaves, whores, errand boys, and more for the wolves in sheep's clothing.

In order for those to stay right or stay in the light, they must defend goodness.  Stand up for truth!  Have boundaries and know when to say, "I will not participate in this act...I am better than this.  I know the God I serve and He wouldn't approve."   Those black folks who have little concept on what it means to "get it together" or "get it right" most likely have been like pigs wallowing in mud for far too long.  Simply put, step outside of the box, read any manual that tells you what the rules of the game are, and test those instructions based on how you would want to be treated.  If it looks or feels wrong, keeps you up at night, makes you wish you should be doing something different, causes you to constantly watch your back, then you have to question, "Why I am putting myself through this?  Is God really in this?"  Chances are He's not.

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7    


Mama Didn't Raise No Fool - So Why Act Foolish?

Have you ever been around someone who claimed that, "Mama didn't raise no fool..." yet all that seems to come out of his or her mouth is foolish things?  Today, I just wanted to share my observation on the foolishness I have seen over time in the black community from the bottom to the top!

Government staff

Whether serving in local, national or international government, how do some fools get some of these jobs?  When it comes to organizing, contributing, coordinating, or coming up with strategic plans, why is it always some kind of unnecessary confusion that usually stems from pride with some black folks? The wealthy black man, with little or much education, thinks he knows it all so he is going to tell someone (who knows more than him) why something doesn't work, or worse steal ideas so as to appear like he knew all along.  He might even go so far as to sell his brother out if he doesn't come begging for his job, willing to do a few things for him, and make other sacrifices that will ultimately make that manipulative black leader shine just a little brighter.  So the one who thought he could fool others, eventually gets played like a fool because above him is an observant white man or woman watching the whole thing play out!


Why is it when an issue arises at the workplace, home, or church, some of our people act like they can't be taught anything or was never made aware of something.  The teacher who was taught by someone over her doesn't know what is happening.  The counselor is overlooked, because a group doesn't think it is wise or beneficial to get outside help and so on.  When problems occur, someone needs to address them.  With the right help, fires are put out quickly.  But some black folks love fires, all kinds, it must be a generational thing--in the bloodline.  If they aren't creating them, they are waiting for the non-black to put it out because some don't trust their own people, while watching and smoking their cares away!


I see far too much foolishness when it comes to parenting.  When is it okay to teach any child nasty dances, nasty music, nasty lifestyle, nasty language, nasty jokes, nasty anything!  The living conditions with some foolish people usually reflect all the nastiness, then they wonder why they just never feel at peace and why a child runs wild.  You reap what you sow!  It was all cute when the children were babies, now these kids turned adults are doing what, or are they fools behind glasses and expensive clothing and shoes? Ignore what the parents and grandparents say, see for yourself!  Did Mama raise a fool?  


Foolish people are like the poor, they will be with us always!  Try ridding yourself of them and sooner or later you will encounter another and another.  The fact there is a day still being celebrated about foolishness or misleading behavior, shows just how immature our country is.  As tempting as it might be to act a fool today or any day throughout the year, consider that many of our people have been acting a fool almost daily in media and elsewhere and are locked up and locked out as a result.
We don't need to wish the fool a happy day, rather we need to warn him or her, "Time is up for many. You might be one of them.  Look around and notice your Creator's wrath is imminent.  Do you know Jesus?"

There are many court jesters on television screens, Internet and elsewhere and many of these black men and women are being called out of a wicked kingdom doing sinful business into a righteous kingdom doing godly business.  Are you one of them?  Mama didn't raise no fool, but she prayed for one!  God bless.

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.

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