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Wednesday

Would You Change if You Were Repeatedly Told How Ugly, Black, Ghetto...You Were?

Let's face it some people just don't like black folks.  Whether you are bi-racial, from the mother land, or raised in America, there are just things about you that non-blacks or maybe even your own people just don't like about you.  So what are haters going to do?  They will pick on you or use people you know to bully you into conforming into what they want you to be.  These children of darkness are going to tell you in so many ways how they don't like your attitude, your hair, the way you look, how you talk, your interests, and who you know.  These controlling individuals are going to build alliances with people who look like you to advise you about things like:  how you need to stay away from certain black folks, how this one and that one is trouble, play dumb about what you know, don't go over there, don't sit here, and more.  Meanwhile, what is all the controlling tactics and negative propaganda doing to your psyche?  You doubt yourself.  You assume the worse from people.  You are paranoid, secretive, worried, fearful, and can't connect to anyone spiritually, mentally, or physically outside your little circle.  The older you get, the smaller your circle.  Sooner or later people will pick up on your "issues" and move on.

From what you look like to where you choose to live, those who don't want your kind (gender/sexuality/skin tone/title/membership/culture/social class) around will have difficulty with you.  You will need to change your appearance, the way you talk, walk, and whatever else if you want to be accepted into certain circles.  Some gullible types still don't believe that it is who you know that gets you "in" and puts others out.  The world around us is filled with symbolism that tells us who is in with who and what you need to do to get favor with this person and that one.  Sleep with the right person, connect with the right group, say the right prayers at the right church, pay the right amount of money...you get the picture.

Those who are labeled with one of those self-hate sort of titles (merely labeled hate perpetuated by non-blacks), are not fit to be around certain people, places and things.  Once you start wearing titles deemed by some groups like:  cool but nasty, crazy but nice, black but fat, good worker but bad attitude, sexy but disloyal, smart but a drunk, etc. then they will take what they know about you and mold you into what they want you to be.  Before long, you are walking and talking in a suit that is not you!  You are confident and financially secure--not.  Intelligent and fun--not really.  Sweet and friendly--that's a joke.  You get the point.  Fake it until you make it, you were most likely advised. Yet, many are still living lies while many more are believing the labels their toxic masters/teachers/parents/siblings/spouses/partners gave them until they rise above them.

"Ugly, blaaaack and ghetto" are popular descriptions used to make some black folks behave and feel inferior.  No one wants to be called these things especially in a mean-spirited tone and from your own people.  But too often, these adjectives are used to describe some you know and those you don't.  You may have called a relative or friend one or more stereotypical names.  The more some African Americans are called names, the worse they act!  Whoever thought that using some kind of reverse psychology to get our people to conform by using negative words, lacked wisdom.  Those of us who have been called all sorts of ugly names growing up suffered much like:  our self-esteem was chipped away at, personal relationships were difficult to get in and stay in, and other issues occurred that didn't build us up.

Sure, you might look good in a nice dress or suit but up under those layers is a broken spirit that needs healing.  People bombarding you or others with ugly names, whether joking or not, is not going to do anything more than harden your heart to love.

Love of self, community, family and more comes alive when we know the truth, defend the righteousness of who we are, and treat others well during the process.  Tell someone, "I love you" today.

Nicholl McGuire shares spiritual insight on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7.  
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African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at africanamericanplanet.blogspot.com.

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