Welcome

This site was created by Nicholl McGuire, Inspirational Speaker and Author. Feel free to comment, share links and subscribe. If you have a business or would like to guest post feel free to contact. Check out topics on this blog and select what interests you. They are found at the bottom of this page. Peace and Love.

Monday

BLACK REDNECKS ~ Thomas Sowell ~ AUDIOBOOK


Spoiling Yourself and Children is a Problem - Wealthy Christians Take Heed


A Bloodline of Deceit -- When Your Ancestry DNA Reveals the Truth

Some African Americans won't bother with genealogy research, because they already know just how bad relatives were in the past.  Most likely, someone in the family might have told them about a great, great grandmother who was once a prostitute instead of proving a wish that she be a queen or a great, great, great grandfather being nothing more than a convict. 

For some relatives, family history is unimportant, they rather forget the past, ignore the present, and get on with the future.  But when you keep seeing the same pattern repeat itself, especially when it involves you or your children, you have to address the issues and it would help to find out why is it that one's roots is filled with so much deceit.  Could it have been the environment and or influence in the community?  The DNA?  The lack of resources and education, etc.?  Maybe it was all of the above, so how does one work to improve his or her family bloodline particularly when it is full of deceit?  It starts with a strong desire to improve self, expose lies, and strive to do better with the family you already have sometimes this means cutting certain people, places and things off!  Being a family doesn't mean putting up with abusive behaviors and continuing teachings that are no longer beneficial and have been known to create division and un-forgiveness.

From lies to baby mama drama's cries, some ancestors may not have bothered to stay out of trouble, because they lacked the know how and the motivation to want to do better, but as one uncle told me, "Trouble always followed me."  How about he wasn't interested in staying away from trouble once it showed its ugly face?  Another relative went to her grave without making peace on this side and wanted to try to make amends on the other side--it was too late.

A long list of relatives who continue, even insist, on surrounding themselves with problems procreate problems i.e.) The Problem Child, Menace to Society, etc.   They just love being around those who have limited their survival to "hustling, getting by, living just another day..." while flossing jewelry, boasting about wardrobes, homes and cars.  When does one look beyond the material?  With this kind of mentality, no matter how cool it sounds, it isn't any wonder why generations experience jail time, bad relationships, terrible health, destructive habits, and more.  When new blood isn't interested in doing better than old blood, then the cycle only repeats itself. 

After spending much time interviewing relatives, checking my family history online, and still piecing some things together, I started noticing negative patterns and I couldn't help but think, "No wonder, some groups want so bad to end whatever is causing a family line to keep producing problem folks."  History shows that those who ponder this issue of families with generational problems/curses had been trying everything from promoting the assimilation of different races in better neighborhoods to interracial marriages.  The public as well as secret groups hope that the African American man and woman (and others like them), with a long bloodline of mental and physical challenges will stop thinking and acting in ways that are not productive to humanity.  As demeaning as it sounds or even strange, the reality is that if one comes from a lineage of deceit, there is always the possibility that someone or many will perpetuate what has been learned from that bloodline.  However, it is just in some people to be evil.  They don't have to be taught, they just are! 

If great, great granddad was a murdering pimp, player and hustler, he may have recruited those after him to be that same way.  Unfortunately, those coming after the evil teacher share what they learn with their children and so on until someone in the bloodline stops the negative behaviors.  For some who can see the destructive patterns clearly in one's family, it took moving to another land and intermixing with those who were far different in the hope that the IQ would be higher, upbringing better, and the negative influence of toxic relatives gone.  It was a matter of survival for those who didn't want to perpetuate destructive generational cycles and yearned for better opportunities, hence the moving and the intermixing throughout the lands.

Once a family historian has found the information that strikes his or her spirit in a way that only he or she can explain, it would make sense to do whatever it takes to make one's family from this day forward:  morally better, spiritually stronger, and physically well.

Nicholl McGuire



   

Thursday

Scandals, Getting Away with Murder and Black Marilyn Monroe Beyonce

Welcome to African American Planet, a blog that has hosted a variety of thought-provoking, uplifting and challenging commentary since 2007.  I am your blog host, Nicholl McGuire and today's topics are: Scandal, Getting Away with Murder and black Marilyn Monroes.

I decided to title my message this way, because I am simply fed up with the systematic negative depiction of yet another generation of African American women.  These women in mainstream media are trading what little morals they have, independence and rights their ancestors fought for, as well as virtue for profitable deals with Satan.  Independent movements have turned into dependence on all people and things related to "getting that money."  Virtue has been swept under the rug while a woman stands on top of it with a whorish and ignorant mentality.

The more educated one is the more she wants to experiment, try something new, go into uncharted territories just to brag, "I am the first African American to..."  What good is it to become the first at anything when the fruit on one's tree has a word like "Scandal" and a resume displays, "Getting Away with Murder." Not that long ago we saw, "Deception" being marketed with an image of a black woman.  In case you didn't get it, these are TV shows with a black lead character that is a woman.  Why would a media entity spend so much money to promote shows like this without an agenda, of course you know they have one?  Why do some YouTubers who promote hate speech toward African American women and men get so many views?  Why are news stories on the rise again about black boys/men being murdered without cause?

Take a look around and you will also see the influence of a long dead icon, Marilyn Monroe, showing up in the way that some of these A-list black women behave.  Beyoncé/Sasha Fierce and her behavior on stage peaks every government official in the White House's interest as well as internationally while an ignorant public who has no time or attention span to pay attention to U.S. confidential business. 

There was a time I remember when Beyoncé was slowly losing her fan base with clothes on (prior to the arrival of Lady Gaga), but when clothes and body movements got more and more sexy, songs and videos grew darker, it was then that the powers-that-be stood behind the former Destiny's Child singer and blew her up, but what did she have to give up for that kind of star power?  Dad was kicked to the curb for starters.  Meanwhile, Beyoncé's hip hop, pimp archetype husband is often seen standing beside her spitting rhymes--the kind that distract the young masses from life issues that really matter, so that they could care less about protesting anything like negative imagery and demeaning song lyrics.

Nowadays, the black, modern day Marilyn Monroe can open legs wide, bend her butt over for the world to see, dress any way the world wants her to, and be available to a power elite who has deep pockets to get her to do whatever they think is necessary.  Let us not forget the other black women actors/sex slaves who recently landed big contracts who are eye-candy for a wealthy non-black establishment who could care less about promoting positive African American images--they reason, "If black folks don't care, why should we?"

So what can we take from heavily promoted shows of scandalous, sexy black women?  They are just doing what white, devious trailblazers have been doing forever and are still doing--using beauty to steal, kill and destroy a life, an opportunity, a body, and/or a soul. 

Don't fall into temptation with a black, scandalous, sex kitten Marilyn Monroe type--your gullible daughters, naïve nieces, crazy cousins and others will be mentally disturbed sooner rather than later if they keep on the wrong path.  I had a white man not that long ago ask me, "Why are there so many black women troubled in their minds?"  Consider what many expose themselves to I shared, like many white women, they think that playing with fire they won't get burned (angry men, poor men, bad bosses, bad investments, lukewarm churches, etc.)  

Watch the following subtle messages that show up in different media and remind those you love why following after certain people/idols is not worth it!
  • Turning to the same sex will not empower black women, they are simply used until someone or group gets tired of them.
  • Hating black men (and self) won't build trust or favor with them or others.
  • Finding two lovers better than one will not win a naïve young lady any respect especially with her peers. 
  • Learning to lie, cheat and steal one's way to success will not feed the soul with what it craves (peace, love and freedom)!
  • Most of all, bad-mouthing and abusing those who speak truth will not keep anyone on top of their game--it's just best to acknowledge the truth for what it is and work to do better. 
Nicholl McGuire 

 

Thursday

Today's Black Men Exposed (MUST SEE)



In one word, thought-provoking, this video is a compilation of past political figures, television characters, musicians, Youtubers, and others speaking about issues related to the family, government, money, ancestry, music, parenting, and more for your encouragement.  There comes a point in one's life when you have to step back from the foolishness and really look for the messages that resonate, motivate, and cause you to want to do some things differently in your life.

What will it take for some brothas and sistas to see what's wrong in their lives and work to do what's right in every situation--from the baby mama drama to the boss at the workplace?  There is something wrong when one defends his or her crutches in life (alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes) knowing full well they are slowly killing he or she.  There is something disturbing when one thinks it is okay to fill his or her mind up, as well as children, with sexy music, images, and all things sexual on a daily basis, yet he or she has no clue how to do something as simple as have an intelligent conversation with the opposite sex.  You have to wonder what is wrong with a loud-mouth man who often is critical of black women or a crazy woman all-too-ready to jump on a black man.

We live in a world of leaders who systematically put subliminal images before your face for your destruction, place chemicals in your food and drink in the hopes you will die sooner rather than later, and do other things to take you off this planet while they rub your back, shake your hand, and smile in your face.  Check videos out like that on YouTube!

Enjoy the above video, check out part two, and post your own exposed video on YouTube or elsewhere, then come back and share your link in comments.

Be encouraged and thanks to ExposureExpo on YouTube for sharing.

Nicholl

   

Wednesday

He's Everyone's Friend - A Serpent in the Grass Looking to Get Some A#$

He wears his clothes well, his jewelry sparkles, his shoes are shiny, his teeth are white, and he smells good.  Whenever someone sees this man, he raises his hand up to wave, nods his head, and asks, "How's everybody?"  He is respected and connected in the public, but behind closed doors he is corrupt usually he has a woman or many women alongside of him that is just as bad as he, if not worse!

"It's all about the money, spend it, save it, earn it...only the strong survive...feel threatened by those around you, figure out a way to rid yourself of the problems...I have lasted this long because I know how to play the game." Mr. Smooth Talker with over 30 years manipulating people and systems to look good on paper says to a group of young black males hanging on his every word.  The bright-eyed naive group don't debate or ask too many questions, because they look at the older black man and all they see is bling.  "He must have done something right..." some say.  But no, the serpent in the suit hasn't done nearly as much right as he has done wrong.  But try telling his following that!  "I love him...he's been good to me...if it wasn't for him!" 

A brotha, or shall I say enemy, like this is strategically placed in the hood in a position of leadership.  He is seen in the predominately black establishment usually collecting some money from someone.  He is watching his fellow brothas and sistas by non-blacks who expect him to, "Keep your people in line."  He knows how to make friends and put them in positions of reasonable power--not too much to overthrow him and not too little that they feel powerless.  But later, he will find a way to snatch them out of their positions when they no longer want to play the Serpent's game. 

His personal agenda is to pay back The Man depending on how deep his wounds go when it comes to dealing with non-blacks (you find this with the old black man who lived during segregation) or be The Man's friend based on how much negativity he has had to deal with when it comes to his own people.  These men and women tend to love all things white, bright and sometimes light, because they have been programmed to do so by ignorant folks who lived before them. 

The man with the dapper suit and showy hat will do just about anything to protect his stake in the game.  He knows how to smile, charm his master and win over the people, but he also knows how to take from the ones who gave him his spot too--even if he has to throw his own people under the bus!  Establishing everything from street cred to kissing babies, the Serpent spends far too much time thinking of ways to keep his reputation intact with certain folks--those who sign his paycheck mainly.

Always looking for the next pawns in his game, the Serpent spots the pretty, gullible, book smart, young lady, the fresh out of college money-loving punk, and the old lady who wouldn't hurt a soul to back him up.  He always has some treats to throw their way to keep them close.  Yet, he also takes a chance to have those in his inner circle who aren't crazy about him.  These are brothas and sistas indebted to him because either they or their relatives asked him for a favor and he hooked them up awhile back, of course charging these poor folks interest.  At some point, the grateful and ignorant can't afford to pay the Serpent back, so he offers them some options.  From sexual favors to having them take a fall for him, the Serpent will make an undercover, off-the-record deal with you when you don't keep your promise to pay him back.  Sometimes, long after you have paid the price, the Serpent never lets you live it down, "Remember, I helped you."

Most people don't believe that the nice black guy or gal, this serpent of a man or woman, is capable of doing wrong to others.  Non-blacks, who pay little attention to what conniving blacks do to their own kind, wouldn't believe the messenger; rather they would say, "No, not him.  Why would you be critical of her, you jealous?  What do you want?  What do you stand to gain?"  They won't buy into the fact that Mr. or Ms. Friendly, who looks good and dresses well, is corrupt. 

Most often the Serpent's fan-base is hand-picked--usually a part of his team somehow someway any way.  Going to them, those who work closely with the corrupt individual and asking them for assistance, is never a good idea.  They will only run back and warn the Charmer.

One who knows someone like this, will need to know the following:  how the Serpent is connected, who are the players in his game, what are his weaknesses/ strengths, and who hates the man or woman with such a passion that they would almost do anything to see the evil man or woman fall.  A recording device, witnesses, and anything else you can find on him or her is essential.  Without proof, there is nothing to say. 

Build up your own team, surround the Serpent, but be prepared to fight for all that belongs to you!  Have your people strategically placed around the Serpent and don't be afraid to cut his or her head off--of course not literally!

It is men and women like this who have been a foe to family, church, workplace, club, etc.  They are the ones who smile in your face and all the while they want to take your place/talents/seat/opportunity--don't let them!

May God be with you!

Nicholl McGuire

BlackPeopleMeet.com/ Online Dating...Personal Experience


Friday

Their View of You, Our View of Us and the Truth Still Remains

Some African Americans become visibly irritated if they see any image of a black person looking less than happy posted anywhere--whether that is on or off the Internet.  They will complain about how a black woman or man might be viewed by others.  "You really should take that down...do you know how that makes us look...why do we have to look that way?"  they say. 

Blacks attempting to censor other blacks from sharing anything that "makes us look bad."  Yet, the best kept secret among many African Americans is not so much keeping the negativity about us out of public view, but what it really goes back to is one's personal thoughts about self--negative things he or she has already done that makes "us" look bad.  "Now why you have to put my business in the street?" I could almost hear someone say.  For instance, if I acted like a complete idiot standing in a check-out line over a price of something that I really couldn't afford, then regretted what I did later, then who made who look bad?  At the moment of disappointment, the last thing an African American is thinking is, "How am I making my race look?"  However, those who are irritated with black folks and wish there was a place for them (like an African American planet), including fellow blacks, will find fault with just about anything drawn, written, shared, recorded, etc. about black folks.  "Do you really have to talk about my outburst in the store?  Why you show a photograph with my face all turned up?  Do you see how that makes us look?"  Nope.  I see how that makes you look!

A picture is a picture whether good, bad or otherwise.  There is a long history of African American images that are unattractive as well as attractive, photographs of blacks doing things they shouldn't, and drawings depicting us in ways that non-blacks think is funny.  The psychological impact that this sort of behavior made on society over the years has been devastating.  As a result, blacks running around hating the way they look and non-blacks assuming a certain appearance is trouble stem from negative imagery--systematic brainwashing.   However, just because that was done and is still ongoing, doesn't mean we should pretend as if there are no bad stories to tell and no negative images to post--we as writers, reporters, creative people, and others still have stories to share whether people like them or not whether good or bad.  I recall a relative say once, "Don't give them any reason to talk about you." Point well said.

When there are issues that need to be dealt with, the alarm will be sounded even when there is a black face attached to it.  And just because it is one face, there is no need to jump on the bandwagon (that a non-black has created) and say, "Look at us...why do we do that...why are we always...?"  Speak for yourself.  We don't have to claim any we anything!  Last I checked, I wasn't on any plantation having to explain to master why we do what we do.

Nicholl McGuire

 

Thursday

Celebrities Speak Out, Truth Revealed: Musicians, Poets, Rappers, Artists, Filmmakers Pun...

Celebrities Speak Out, Truth Revealed: Musicians, Poets, Rappers, Artists, Filmmakers Pun...: Most artists allow their true personal feelings, experiences, and other emotional responses to periodically leak out in their art form, but...

They are Watching You and Your Skin Color Has Nothing to Do with It

Not every non-black looks at a black person and thinks, "He is black and I don't like him...She is dark so I won't speak to her."  There are intelligent non-blacks in this world who look beyond the surface.  Yet, some of our people need to be reminded of this before they spout ignorance all over the place.  Not every white, red, yellow, or even black person has a problem with another because of skin tone, but what they do have a problem with is rude, shameful, downright ignorant behavior!

Grandma was right when she warned, "Watch how you carry yourself.  Stop talking so d#mn loud!  Why are you acting so simple?  Use your brain, God gave you one, didn't He?  Why are you giving those white people something to talk about, Fool?"

So Grandma's advice didn't sound so nice, but you got the point and if you didn't have a grandma around, someone warned you about how non-blacks viewed you and why you had to work 110% better than everyone else.

It is unfortunate that many people who miss out on wise teachings are those that frustrate both white and black, rich and poor.  People who don't use any common sense!  They have to be seen "showboating" or "making it rain."  They have to do stupid things "to represent."  They have to shake their behinds for the whole world to see, "Look at me...look at me!  Yeah, I'm all dat, see how wide I spread my legs!"  Who chooses these fools anyway to represent the African American populace?   Ignorance does, ignorance begets ignorance.  There is a lot of money made from likes, page views, and subscribers who love ignorance! 

Funny has its place, like a half-nude woman has her place, ghetto has its place, like a crazy person has his mental ward.  But these days everything that was once in the closet and in its place, is now out in the open for the whole world to see!  There is no proper place for the subculture and all its baggage that comes with it, nope, it is celebrated, marketed, and served to you like it is the gospel!

There is a way to put all the stupidity back in a closet, box, jail cell, or wherever it needs to go.  You know, how?  You don't buy it!  You don't talk about it!  You move away from it!  You don't spread the links on your social networking pages!  You don't support it!  You don't hold back your tongue when you don't like it!  That's how you keep the ignorance at bay.
 
People all over the world watch African Americans (especially on the Internet) and they are commenting, hating, and questioning.  Why give them something negative to talk about that further proves a stereotype?  Why fill your mind with reality TV programming and then go out into the world and act like fools?  Why chase after women who lack morals?  Why have sex/make babies with men who are uneducated, unavailable, broke, down-low, hate women, or could care less about you?  

Contrary to what we see in the media, there are intelligent African Americans who aren't in politics swindling the people, who don't scream from pulpits while shaking people up so that they give money, who aren't cursing and fighting one another, and who aren't broke, busted and disgusted.  But you don't see us in mainstream media because they say, "We are boring...we don't know anyone...we don't have enough influence, money..."  I tell you my friends, we exist.

So if you are an African American, I say, give them nothing but opportunity and positivity to talk about!

Nicholl McGuire

 

Wednesday

Macho Man, Effeminate Male - Where's the Balanced Gentlemen?

Media has created one extreme or another when attempting to tell black men how to be men.  If the African American isn't in love with himself and his "boys" then he is parading around acting like a woman.  Where are the balanced men in mind, body and spirit?  Are they all married or in relationships allowing wives/girlfriends to feminize them or are they standing their ground--protecting households and making wise decisions based on spiritual precepts?

As much as I would love to have something nice to say about mainstream African Americans in media and elsewhere, I look around and I see men looking back at me who have nothing to say, meaningful or otherwise.  Mean eyes, negative attitudes (the nerve of some to talk about women), complaints about not being appreciated by their women, too busy to make time for families, while telling their boys, "I love you...we should get together some time." What is wrong with this picture?  Something looks and smells weird in the atmosphere.

Real women dash the fantasies of superficial men who dream of luxury cars and homes, strippers, stripper poles, parties, drinks, and drugs.  They snap lost men back into a reality that they don't want to face, "When are you getting a job?  What have you been doing all day?  What are you doing with your money?  Whose that b&tch you keep talking to on the Internet and on your phone?  Why can't we get ahead and what kind of legal plan can you come up with to help our family?"  Some black men will bend over backwards for non-blacks and won't think too much about helping those in their own families who really, truly desire to do something big!  A lazy black man or boy with a lot of time on his hands will get he and his family into trouble!

I heard a minister preach a word about what defines a spiritual man.  I agreed with the preacher that if a man isn't reading the Holy Bible to help him understand who he is, isn't spending any time with his Creator, and isn't practicing what he is learning, then he has no clue what a spiritual man is!  He will falsely assume that what he sees in a weak church is a man or what he observes when seated on his front porch looking at men in the street are real men. 

Being tough, rough, and getting a lot of stuff my friends is not a real man!   However, a man who has love in his heart, who cares about people, shows he is kind, patient, responsible, accountable to God, and generous with others while exhibiting self-control and honesty is a real man!  Real men aren't afraid of hard work!  A man who is confident in who he is doesn't need to think and act like a woman!  He shouldn't have to fight everyone and everything to prove he loves his family by snapping his fingers, rolling his neck, or switching his behind out of a room while slamming the door behind him!  Yet, media is the counselor, teacher, mentor, father, and more to so many macho and effeminate black men and boys who sit in front of television and the Internet for hours day-after-day watching characters in movies and players on fields and courts.  Their own fathers, grandfathers, and uncles ain't sayin' nothin' while they watch right along with them!  The athlete teaches the man how to treat women like a ball on the field/court and the cowboy/villian/gangster/corrupt leader shows men how to kill another human being emotionally, physically, or spiritually while tearing down an infrastructure. 

Opportunities to impart wisdom come and go and the only thing many elders are saying is, "Where you get those shoes, Nephew?  Wow, that hair-cut looks nice...Yeah Man, I got this car for a good price, check out my watch too!"  If a black man isn't ever quiet, spending some real time to think about his life, and could care less about reading to obtain the knowledge he needs to survive, then it isn't any wonder that his spirit dies followed by his body.  A black lover can't save him, his momma becomes tired of talking to him, and his daddy is too busy doing his own thing, so what does he truly have?  Himself and a God he may or may not want in his life. 

Living in a dying world and all one cares about is what he looks like or what he has is sad--it's pathetic!  What's worse is that the very things that a man spends his whole life working and fighting for he doesn't keep in the end.  He brought nothing into the world and therefore he can take nothing out, so the holy scriptures tell us.

Those that are seemingly balanced in mind, body and spirit, please do take up some time with the young men and boys and teach them spiritual insight on what it means to be a real man as God defines.

Nicholl McGuire 

Saturday

BLACK MEN DATING OLDER WOMEN


Celebrities Speak Out, Truth Revealed: Musicians, Poets, Rappers, Artists, Filmmakers Pun...

Celebrities Speak Out, Truth Revealed: Musicians, Poets, Rappers, Artists, Filmmakers Pun...: Most artists allow their true personal feelings, experiences, and other emotional responses to periodically leak out in their art form, but...

Looking to Start Your Own Business - Do You Have a Plan for Your Hustle?

Planning the Hustle is Far More Challenging than Playing the Game

Whatever your hustle professional or not, planning how you are going to get money is one of the most challenging things you will have to do in order to survive in this world.  Everyone expects to get paid from the grocery store owner to the relative you borrowed money from and with that said, if you don't plan your hustle right from the start, it will fail!

Now what you choose to do to make money and keep it coming for awhile is all up to you.  If you permit too many people in your ear about what it is you want to do, you will find yourself not doing too much of anything.  Your hustle must be kept private before telling any trusted advisers.  Ask yourself the following:

1.  What is it that I am willing to do to make money?
2.  Is what I am about to do legal?
3.  Am I willing to file the necessary paperwork to make it legit? 
4.  Am I qualified to do what I plan to do?  Do I have a license, certificate, degree, etc. for it?
5.  Who would be willing to help me?
6.  What tools will I need and how much will everything cost me?
7.  How much money will I need to make to keep my "hustle" or business afloat?

If you were interested in selling goods like cosmetics, clothing, home décor, etc. then you know that you will need suppliers.  You will also need to be sure that you have access to the people who might be interested in what you are selling.  What does the supply look like compared to the demand?  You know you will need a marketing plan and will have to invest much money and time to make your business a success.  If you barely have free time now, then how do you expect to give it your all to a business?

If you can answer simple questions about your business in detail, then you are on your way to building a solid business plan.  Use the Internet to find out how to build your organization.  Find business plan templates related to what you want to do and use them to help formulate your business structure.  Research competitors.  Talk with people in a similar industry.  Ask questions related to the pros and cons of running your operation.  Also, find out how you can get others to invest in your business.  But never go to people and ask them to help out when you have no paperwork, no bank account, and no verifiable information that shows you are indeed a legitimate business.  Honest people want to do business with honest folks!

To your success!

Nicholl McGuire is the author of When Mothers Cry, Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic and other books.  She has inspirational audios/videos on spiritual issues at YouTube channel: nmenterprise7

Thursday

Threatening, Controlling Folks and the Family Who Loves Them

Those that have never experienced living with, dating, or dealing with the drunk, foolish, drug addicted, or just plain crazy in the family just don't get it.  Why do women stay?  Why does a good man put up with a bad woman?  Why is a seemingly good couple always at each other's throat?  Why do the children have to suffer like that?

The mentally ill just can't help themselves.  The more they reason, "I'm okay, it's them!" the sicker they are.  The evidence of their sickness shows up in eyes, a walk, a talk, a bank account, a one night stand, in the household, at the church and even on the job that someone we love is just not well.  All some relatives and friends know how to do is make excuses for the mentally and physically ill, while talking about what they wish they could do or what they think "The Problem" should do. 

When one's demons has riddled a troubled mind, there is no reasoning.  He is going to fight you when you say, "You are sick and you need to get help!"  She is going to rationalize that what she is doing to herself and family is really not bothering anyone.  The sick will place the blame on the accuser, "It's because of you I'm this way...if it wasn't for...maybe none of this would have happened."  If the mentally troubled isn't blaming, they are pretending that everything is okay and "don't worry about it.  You got other people and things to be concerned about, I'm good."  Really!?

Loved ones will stick it out with the physically abusive, mentally controlling, verbally assaulting, and the motor mouth talking, because "I love him, things will get better.  I know she can be bad, but that's my girl.  We've been through worse."  But there comes a point in any relationship where the hand-holding, sexing, excuse-making, and everything else has to stop.  Even the God above will tell you, "Stop, there is nothing else you can do."  When the writing is on the wall, one had better listen unless he or she wants to hit rock bottom too. 

Energy sappers will suck the life out of you, pull you and everything connected to you down in the hole with them.  Before long, you have little money to take care of your own family, you owe far too many creditors, you find yourself avoiding certain people for fear that someone else's issues might become yours, all the while trying to persuade yourself that things will get better when deep inside we know they won't remain that way for long.

When you finally awake to the nightmare of a troubled loved one and realize that you can't run anymore, that is when you attempt to awaken others, but enablers don't want to hear it.  People who justify every wrong, help relatives and friends kill relationships, self and so on--while exaggerating the few nice things that a problematic relative does--will not face the fact that someone in the family has major issues that need to be dealt with or else.  The key is making that "or else" real and handling that "what will happen if I don't" rebuttal that the mentally ill like to throwback.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic.  Check out videos/audios of her work on YouTube channel: nmenterprise7 

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African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at africanamericanplanet.blogspot.com.

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