Blogger Tips and TricksLatest Tips And TricksBlogger Tricks


This site was created by Nicholl McGuire, Inspirational Speaker and Author. Feel free to comment, share links and subscribe. If you have a business or would like to guest post feel free to contact. Check out topics on this blog and select what interests you. They are found at the bottom of this page. Peace and Love.


Growing Up Black In China

My Black Is Beautiful Money Saving Tips, Goals


No Love for His People, Protective of the Black Man's Love Stick

Over the years, I have been told by non-black women about how they just love a black man's love stick to put it nicely.  They also claimed to have no problem with blacks and even went so far as to boast the ever-popular comment of having "a black friend" or two including myself.  Yet, actions speak louder than words and as I sat an observed these all-too-excited non-blacks, who landed themselves black men or was chosen by more than a few, I couldn't help but feel some degree of discomfort being in these lust-filled women's presence.

I knew that their so-called love for black people in general was not genuine.  There were things said, mannerisms displayed, and an over protectiveness of their black men, as if they were going to get away when around their own ethnicity or others.  They could care less about their black men's family unless their was some benefit to them like getting close to a few to get some information or recruit a snitch or two to watch out for their player boyfriends and husbands.  However, overall they were more concerned about taking their black men away from all things black i.e.) black neighborhood, churches, relatives, friends, music, food--you name it.  The true essence of being black doesn't mesh too well in other cultures, so one must assimilate new information and adopt a brand new lifestyle and way of talking in order to survive.  If the black man sees his life will be bettered by someone, who is in love with his stick, then he won't hesitate to take advantage.  He reasons, love for or from the woman will follow one day.  Yet that doesn't happen for many adventure seeking non-blacks especially when things stop working as good as they once did. 

Maybe the overprotective, jealous and insecure attitudes of non-black women were valid since a few did have players for mates, but still I didn't notice or experience a real love for blacks, I just felt a tolerance.  I was the former partner, cousin, friend, co-worker who knew or knew of the black guys who were magnets of white women; therefore, I was considered "okay, safe, a trustworthy source." 

In my opinion, there is something wrong with any woman who is in love with a man's private part.  When she worships something that has a purpose that simply pleasures, releases waste and makes babies, you have to wonder what, if any, God or gods does she serve.  What is it about esteeming a man's Johnson?  We see symbols all over this world recognizing pagan sexual god worship along with a male body organ exaggerated to demonstrate power.  For some women, they are captivated, strangely obsessed, and crazy for erect flesh beyond what its function is.  They will fight, manipulate, lie, argue, and even use religion to justify their many sins committed as a result of chasing after and attempting to maintain a black man's love stick.

I recall boys and men brag about their private parts while thinking there was nothing wrong with what they were doing.  Instructed by the elders that came before them on using what they got to get what they want, some learned to master women and girls with what they knew.  Some recognized the significance of what good love-making could do for them and how many girls and women will latch on like dogs in heat.  Unfortunately, far too many fathers never broke their so-called code of honor with the guys.  They failed to educate their naïve daughters on the many manipulations a handsome black man with a big Johnson will use on them.  Therefore, these gullible young as well as old black and non-black women become nothing more than yet another notch on a man's belt--a belt they typically bought.

The boldness of this piece isn't meant to offend, but to awaken those who may be encouraging such behavior--a glorification of a love stick that was never meant to be idolized, argued about, protected like gold, or treated as if there is something so special and holy about it.  It was just another creation by a God who made the sun, moon, animals, nature, and more.  But what is scary is that he is the same God that has a long history of destroying idols.  It isn't any wonder that these lust-filled romances don't last, and those that do gain some years are typically unhappy.

Nicholl McGuire 


Prayed for God's Assistance? Why are the Wicked Still Prospering?

Tradition - The Joy, Peace and Craziness on a Holiday with Black Folk

For years, I avoided any family gatherings no matter what they were celebrating, I just didn't want to have to contend with certain folks who I knew were not all-together in their minds.  It can be draining dealing with the wild folks that can't and won't shut up.  Others who don't know how to keep their hands to themselves.  As well as those difficult relatives who have more issues than the law allow!

When you have your own personal dramas sometimes it is just best to stay away--and I'm not mad at those who do!  I did reach out in recent years to relatives and friends and made my way around-- seeing people I hadn't seen in a long time.  I showed some love and offered service and gifts when I could.  I was also grateful to see how the children had grown as well.

With soulful music playing in the background, joyful laughing heard from different rooms, and bright, sunny days at some of these events, what was there to complain about?  I personally avoided any conversations about religion, politics, money, relationship, and somebody's children.  I kept things light.  It is such a nice feeling to come away from an event without having to repent over something you said because you allowed someone to take you there.

To my readers, who might have had to check someone this holiday season and feel a rise on the inside every time you think about certain folk, take a slow breath.  Focus on the things that warmed your heart that day.  Reflect on those good times and just remember, there is always that possibility that someone at the event you attended recently just might not make it next year or any year after that.

God bless y'all!



African American Christmas Music

History of Black Athletes and Entertainers Marrying White Women

Start Thinking about Making Passive Income for the New Year

You never know what a day might bring, this is why one must be prepared.  With financial times changing like the wind, you will want to consider having extra money somewhere just in case you might need it.

Most people go online and do the typical things: check email, visit a social networking page, view an online banking account, watch some videos, and research a few things.  However, one can best use his or her time, especially when bored, to make money.  There are so many ways to do it from marketing your own services via ads to participating in surveys and online games.  See the following link for many legitimate sites that have cut their overhead costs and choose to do business online.  These companies are willing to pay you to work from home.  Click here for a recent list: Supplemental Income


Are you a Christian interested in Freemasonry?

They must no longer offer any of their sacrifices to the goat idols
to whom they prostitute themselves.

Leviticus 17:7


Intelligence More Precious than Silver and Gold

After spending years observing our people and hearing racist whites and others speak negatively about some, I recognize the ignorance and lack of intelligence from those individuals.  However, I also see, even nowadays, the stereotypical behaviors playing themselves out with not just blacks, but other ethnicities too on various reality shows. 

From nasty attitudes to explosive tempers, the mean-spirited men and women, who don't want to be depicted as unintelligent, ugly, or crazy, are being just that!  The ring leaders and producers of these shows do not mind exploiting ignorant people, who typically have low-self-esteem, personality disorders, and more.  Racists are sitting on couches laughing at how blacks act on television and elsewhere saying, "I told you so!  See why I don't want my daughter or son dating those people!"

When you think back to days when you were in school, you may have recalled some individuals who were known for being trouble-makers and you may have noticed how they looked.  Some may have been pretty, handsome, and others ugly or scary looking.  You might have noticed a pattern with these students.  The ones that came from decent backgrounds and were considered smart tended to do well in school while others who didn't look or act the part missed out on much.  Instead of putting one's head in his or her studies, those who were considered disadvantaged or at risk, were too busy commenting about the smarter students, "They think they better than us...they are treated better...why they get this and that and we don't?" 

As a child, I questioned why darker skin individuals tended to act strangely at times with me.  I was one of those students who had a strict upbringing so there was no talking smart to teachers, cursing with friends, smoking and drinking, and if you acted like you wanted to be with a boy, there was going to be hell to pay.  I wondered why I had a disconnect with some of our people especially darker skin black males.  The conversation back then was non-existent unless of course one wanted to "talk" to me.  What came out of these boys mouths was laughable and the truth was they weren't doing much in school other than playing sports or playing girls. 

I was aware of what parents and grandparents had told some of us kids about light skin and white individuals and also heard what they said about dark skin people.  What was wrong with these adults?  Why were they so focused on what someone looked like?  Why did they think that people who were lighter acted better?  Much of this foolishness came from past programming, but some things were evident.  Light, dark and white people did behave in ways that were negative at times because adults encouraged nasty behavior.  If a mother made a big deal about skin tone, hair and the appearance of a child's body, then of course the child was going to behave as if he or she was better or not so much depending on the kind of programming he or she received.  Then there were those who acted as if they were smarter, but the truth was that many whites and lighter skin blacks did behave differently and were doing well in school.  However, I noticed that many of the mixed children were in Advanced Placement classes and were a part of extracurricular activities while those who were considered "more black" were struggling in some studies. 

Now there has been past research done dealing with mental aptitudes and racists love promoting the scores between whites, blacks and mixed people, see here.  Unfortunately, those that I attended school with many were more focused on music, television, sports, and could care less about anything outside of those categories.  These interests were passed down from previous generations who didn't think that knowing much outside of what a teacher put in front of a child was necessary.

I am disappointed when I look at our modern day society and I see the same nonchalant attitude regarding education and wisdom being encouraged.  Why is there such a disinterest in advancing one's intelligence starting with self, next one's own children and then community?  It is pitiful!  Wise words invite eye-rolls, deep sighs, followed by a negative attitude that refuses to listen to anything thought-provoking especially with most blacks who prefer to be entertained by a TV screen then to read a book.  Many of our people go about their business, having very little to say about things of substance.  If it isn't about weather, money, sex, cars, clothing, and other related things, the eyes don't widen, the eye-brows don't perk up, and the ears are barely listening.

Fathers and mothers often too busy to teach children critical thinking skills; find it more important for a child to play and stay out of the parent's way.  Isn't this what many of our parents, grandparents and great grandparents did with us?  Didn't they want us to be seen and not heard?  Didn't they expect us to go off somewhere and stay out of their hair?  So many of us repeat the past and then become angry when confronted about it.  Some will make excuses and claim they are not like their fathers and mothers.  Others will say something like, "I expect my children to do great things in the future," but how much time and energy are some black parents putting in to build up their intelligence?  Are you giving them opportunities to make decisions on their own?  Are they able to get dressed, organize their things, and tend to tasks without your doing everything for them or berating them for not getting things done?  Are black parents taking advantage of school breaks and introducing children to useful material that will keep their minds become sharp and competitive?

I admit I haven't figured it all out when it comes to increasing the mental aptitude of our people, but what I can say is that running to non-blacks to solve one's issues with parenting, relationships, business, and spirituality might be helpful to some.  But those that have enough sense to make sense of what is happening with the spiritual black man and woman's relationship, should be doing what they can to preserve it.  I'm not referring to just any black person, but those who have been set apart to do the will of their Creator.  Those that know his voice, know what they are supposed to do.  They must stop down-playing wisdom or making excuses by saying they are too busy to learn some things to better their lives and those coming after them.  Notice black folks know how to make time to watch TV. 

Intelligence isn't like the latest fashions that come and go, it is and will always be in style!

Nicholl McGuire

Check out more on Race and Intelligence here. 

Teach Someone to Read - EBLI - The Meaning of EBLI, How EBLI Works, and More


Bill Cosby Jokes About "Spanish Fly" Being Used to Drug Girls in 1969 Comedy ...

African American Escapism

Escapism is a mental diversion by means of entertainment or recreation, as an "escape" from the perceived unpleasant or banal aspects of daily life. - Wikipedia

Witnessing for years a black man recreate his father and mother's hurtful past, I couldn't help but wonder had he recognized what he was doing.  Did he know that trying to play toxic roles that they created for themselves was not therapeutic?  They were divorced.  These people had used non-blacks to help them escape their past pain.  They had took on yet another identity, not their own, in an effort to hide past disappointments.  But running from one's self, background, environment, and more did little to bring peace to the former couple who went on to marry non-blacks.  The young man who saw the foolishness of parents had taken his own identity and wrapped it up in what he thought was best for him with his mother's stamp of approval.  He too would attempt to run from his black wounded self. 

Some African Americans have done something like what has been described when it comes to personal and professional relationships.  If the person, place or thing is unpleasant and one is tired of having to battle with he, she or it, then the question arises, "What should I do?"  Typically, the one accusing others of running when things get heated in relationships, at work, and elsewhere, ends up being the runner.  After one has found safety in a wicked non-black group, large costly house, expensive automobile, immoral sex, or something else that causes additional headaches, he or she no longer deals with deep-rooted issues.  The focus is now on the person, place or thing they are using to escape one's unpleasant past life.  Although the side effects of previous pain are apparent, the stubborn and self-righteous man, woman, or child is not going to address them.  "Leave me be!  I just want to laugh, cry, have fun looking at someone or something else...don't make me look at me! Okay?" The Runner cries.

For so long, many African Americans have run from those black conscious thinkers that remind them of their differences from others, and why they must separate themselves from worldly thinkers, idol worshipers, immoral activities, and the like.  But the "I know everything" types will continue to wallow in their mess justifying their ugly ways while attempting to recruit others to take a swim in their filth.

Looking to despicable music, video games, movies, and senseless printed media to escape responsibilities, the African American nowadays does little for the body, mind or soul especially after receiving one's most coveted degree.  Tossing back a few too many drinks and smoking up this thing and that one only causes one's mind to contort into nothing more than a zombie over time.  A walking dead man or woman can't remember much, is unable to articulate well, will not stay faithful in a relationship, is not a good parent, has trouble focusing on tasks, and is unable to accomplish anything worthwhile from all his or her partying over the years.  There comes a point when one just can't escape from truth anymore!  He or she has to look at the person looking back at him or her in the mirror.  It is then that self-reflection will make one view his or her life decisions.

Society's evil delights entrap, debilitate, and cause chaos in the family home and in other places.  Sure, they look good, feel nice, and do other things that attract the weak-minded, but you know it is all smoke and mirrors when you can't do much else with these evil delights except ask for more.  Those who have spent anytime feeling like a prisoner in a relationship or have been to prison, know what it feels like to have one's freedom taken away.  Entertainment and guilty pleasures restricts minds--imprisons them so that they can't think of anything more than to get one's fleshly needs met, sometimes by any means necessary.  Take a look at example after example of celebrities who thought that by using their money to buy things in an effort to escape their pain they would be happy only to find their darkest secrets exposed for all the world to see. 

Deep thinking is absent when one is high off a substance, a new purchase, another relocation, a new love, and other things.  Those that "been there, done that" know that many African Americans are weak to substance abuse, gambling and shopping.  Unfortunately, these same people will take those weaknesses and capitalize off of them.  They could care less about one's problems.  For some haters, they hope the African American family self-destructs.  They have no problem leading the sheep to slaughter to fatten their wallets.  If one's mind is unconscious he or she will keep right on doing devilish things that will eventually cost lives.

This is just something to think about for those who love sipping, puffing, and watching all things ugly on TV and the Internet--life is too short, welcome yourself back to reality.

Nicholl McGuire shares insightful audio/video here.


10 Moments Black People In The Workplace Know Too Well

What More Do You Need Besides Money?

If you ask most people around you what they need, they would say, "More money."  But can I tell you from personal experience, when the money comes, it goes and you only end up wishing for more.

Some years back an opportunity came to my household that our family was ecstatic about.  It required relocating and settling in an area that was laid back, rarely any traffic, no major stores within walking distance, and no buses or taxi cabs nearby.  Police and fire vehicles were hardly ever seen or heard.  It was a nice suburban environment with rural surroundings nearby (i.e.) fields, cattle and a lake.  The draw for us city folks, from Los Angeles County, going there, money!

Now we were not exactly comfortable with such simple living in a small town in Georgia, and we also weren't use to having to rely on a vehicle to go to most places either.  There was an unspoken objection about being there, but no one in the family said anything initially even though mannerisms said otherwise.  As challenges increased what appeared to be a good opportunity was turning into a wilderness experience.  We dealt with insects of all shapes and sizes that liked to come and visit us every time a door or window was opened.  We were often exhausted from the heat.  We noticed people ate and drank too much and we became fearful that their laziness was rubbing off on us.  Irritability, boredom, and other issues increased, but we rejected the red alert signs that told us, "This atmosphere really isn't for you, go back to what you are used to."  Rather, we focused on the money, the spacious house, and a huge backyard for the kids--simple living...that was our motivation for coping. 

Less than three years later, the opportunity turned sour and we headed back to where we started out, back to our beloved busy town in So-Cal with many apartment buildings, small homes and laughable so-called backyards.  It was home, we had no business leaving in the first place.  Looking back, I realized that our wilderness experience was not one we really needed, but it did teach us a simple lesson from simple living, "Be appreciative of what you already got."   Having more money, a house and new gadgets didn't make us feel any better in the long term.  We didn't treat one another any better, we didn't act grateful for anything before we were buying something else, and we found ourselves shopping more because we could.  What little money we did manage to save was ate up by moving expenses.

There sincerely is more to life then getting more money for more things.  What I have found is it really isn't more money that one needs, but more education on how to manage what you already have.  Learning doesn't stop after you graduate from school.  I also find that the more we buy, the more we try to ignore what is really wrong within.  A mother is unhappy with having to spend much time with children or too little time.  A husband is disappointed in his partner and regrets past decisions he has made.  Relatives can be emotionally and physically draining.  Therefore, one reasons buying stuff will shut up everyone and make them happy.  Putting money in someone's hand will do nothing more than place you on their list of potential givers.  When that person needs something, he or she knows you got money and will expect you to come to his or her aid.

What more do we need besides money?   The answer is life-changing gifts that have no dollar sign.  Things like:  more love, peace, free time to think deeply, and patience for starters.  Our focus should not be inundated with obtaining material things when a relationship is dying, there is war at home or elsewhere, children are doing poorly, and one's mind is often confused or emotionally upset.  Money will pay for things, but it can't heal a broken spirit.

Nicholl McGuire, see more of the writer's work on video here.  


Mistreating Black Men Doesn't Make Them Less Human It Only Makes Them Stronger

Tell a black man not to date outside of his race, be good to his black woman or else, cheat on him, marry then divorce him, fire him, curse at him, lie on him, push him, scream at him, scar him or shoot him down and you do nothing more than win sympathy for him! 

Anyone with a little bit of love, compassion, and care for another human being, will run to that person and ask him, "Do you need my help?  I will love you...don't worry we will win this war together...I got your can count on me!"

The elite non-black organizations are not as smart as they claim to be.  Look at our world to date and someone or group is risking his or her life for a black man--no matter the color, economic status, sexual orientation, religion, or gender.  Don't believe me?  Look at how many thus far have lost their freedom, inconvenienced their lives, and did more for a righteous cause related to a black man.  Sure, it was for a cause but black men everywhere will still be affected.  If the white power structure thought they were winning by killing yet another unarmed black man, they are mistaken!  You might kill the flesh, but you can't kill the spirit!

The black woman is not in the limelight for any particular mind-blowing event these days for good reason, because she is too busy allowing herself to be presented as an entertainment whore!  From reality shows to dancing on stage, just open wide so the world can see and experience your goods!  If your too old to strut, you can always write or talk about all things nasty with your fellow cast members.  Stick out your butt, black woman, and you just might land a romantic evening with a freak with a large bank account.  Why not go a little further and encourage little girls to live your puppet dreams?  Nevertheless, the lost black woman is affected by what is happening to black men whether she knows the men or not.  She has been traumatized yet again especially if there has been violence in her own family.  She is forced to work harder, play harder, make that know all the rest because chances are you or someone you know is going through right now.  Just as her enslaved ancestors, the black woman is forced to watch someone that looks like her cousin, brother, uncle, or some other male relative go off, fight, be abused, and eventually die.  A mother will see her son in all the chaos and grieve for the mother who lost her's.  She becomes angry at the parent who wasn't around, the child who was at the wrong place at the wrong time, the peers who didn't have her child's back, the community who could care less, and the authority figures who intend to make some money off her child. But even in her weakness, she too is strong!

Once again an elitist power structure has got it all wrong, coming after the wrong people with the wrong plan.  They forgot we still have soldiers fighting spiritual wars not everyone is distracted by tomfoolery and not everyone is hoodwinked either!  From infiltrating music to polluting the media with negative imagery of the worst black folks (fools, ignorant, mentally handicapped, on drugs, etc. as if there are no non-blacks that aren't crazy and ghetto), demonic forces are at work again to mentally and physically enslave the spiritual black family--we aren't talking about just any group.  By using demonic oppression, traumatic images, and shocking events, the hope is to debilitate the thinking mind.  You are doing too well some of you talented, educated, and rich black folks, you knew the haters would work hard to slow your roll and many are falling for it! 

The black male is lured into relationships and business partnerships he can't manage, own or control.  He is told to pay attention to everything that is wrong with the black woman and call her crazy, stupid, strange, etc.  He is convinced he is slicker, smarter, wiser, and more by enablers who are simply using him in the meantime for selfish gain.  But let us not get so caught up in blackness that we are no earthly good, shall we?

The mistreatment of black men in front of the world is backfiring to some degree and it has little do with skin tone and a whole lot to do with economics.  Businesses suffer, profits decline, and other community related issues and now someone is ready to get the actor off the stage.  Sooner or later those that will be enlightened to wisdom will realize that not only is ethnicity and finances are under attack, but there is also a spiritual attack occurring as well so that men, who have been called to come up higher, will lose site of their roles in kingdom business as well as the Creator who called them to their assignments.  Projects cost money, new infrastructures more money, rebuilding communities additional finance, and those who hate certain ethnicities prospering, don't want wealthy people building or rebuilding in communities they plan on overtaking.  Self interest groups know that many American citizens are awaking.  The manipulators know that "buying the best, most expensive, and biggest" type of brainwashing that has been occurring for decades is not working for the upcoming generations.  Do you really think the young black man was called to do nothing more than play on fields, courts, and on the street while his earthly father plays servant, snitch or second fiddle to people from the board room to the White House?  There are bigger things ahead for those willing to receive and walk in their callings. 

Many black people, lacking in critical thinking skills, are so easily distracted by bright colors, shiny things, and devices that make noise that they can't see plots against them, they don't bother to create detailed plans, or study wise books.  What better way then to weaken the black man then to put the brightest color skin tone in front of him with the longest hair wearing the brightest colors, but there is one catch, these eye-catchers don't have the brightest minds!  Typically the puppet recruits the puppet and the master has them both! 

The crème de la crème of their group (the wealthy, white establishment) will always be reserved for the elitists.  Don't be mistaken!  Sure, the rich non-blacks might convince some to eat from their tables, drink their drinks, have their women, and ride in their cars, but when the fun is over, there are taxes to pay and consequences for sin when you look at things from a spiritual perspective.  You reap what you sow!  Those that are non-black, privileged and book-smart, but unwise, don't see the matrix of events unfolding, because since birth they have been given much.  So when they see blood stained pavement, a long history of abused and deceased black men, as well as cries from the people, it is shocking to their weak systems, "What can we do to help?" 

These recent tragic events are drawing on the heartstrings of non-blacks making them more caring.  Many will empathize not because a man is black, but due to the fact that he is a human being.  A white racist's plan backfires when the white woman begins to care for the black man and his children.  However, those looking to create a higher intellect through interracial mating simply shrug their shoulders while white red-necks and ghetto blacks, don't see the big picture.  A picture that slowly but surely takes what once was, black man + black woman = black babies and mixes them all up to the point that a black mindset is no more; rather a colorless mindset with the capability to do great things, besides physical labor, emerges.  This is a belief of those who want to create super human beings.  No more ghetto, ignorance, rude attitudes, emotionalism, spirituality, slavery and poverty mentalities historically popular amongst many blacks is their hope.  These are just some of the stereotypical things that some rich and poor black men run from while hoping that their next lover will be different than their last lover--a black woman. 

Spiritual black people are a threat to any group!  Troublesome blacks are worse and many want them swiftly put in graves.  Black fathers, grandfathers, and great grandfathers just didn't learn valuable lessons or practiced what they learned from the wise when it came to marriage, parenting, religion, business, protest, buying and selling property, etc.  Therefore, ill-informed sons lie in graves prematurely having repeated the lifestyles of  "too busy to play" kind of dads or absentee fathers.  These same workaholics, players, pimps, and hustlers outlive their sons and continue to preach a ghetto gospel with no Savior in view and no useful tools to fight spiritual warfare. 

You play with fire, you will get burned!  In and out of the church, in and out of someone's bed, in and out of an office, and in and out of traffic, there is no rest for a weary, backsliding, or lost soul.  Some spiritual as well as unspiritual blacks play with pagan traditions knowing full well what they represent and take no stand.  Meanwhile mistreating one another over things they don't understand. Then when one finds that the devil is real and it is time to pay up for compromises, the brother or sister will throw anyone under the bus for money, fame, position, and power.  The mistreated will mistreat his or her own!

The true essence of biblical text hasn't changed, there are still many wise words left to piece the puzzle together between an angry God and a flawed man--no matter the skin tone.  But those who think they can disrespect a man, who doesn't want any trouble--minding his own business, especially a spiritual one, will reap what they have sown!  This nation doesn't experience much heartache for nothing, too much playing in other people's backyards (bullying others) will get many hurt.  Some have said the un-justice, the protesting, the shootings are all happening to prepare us for the fall of our American government leadership.  I can't say, but what I will say is there is indeed an unseen war--one that is worth praying about.  Consider orchestrating a plan just in case something unbelievable does go down in the coming months; rather than react in the way that "they" will expect you to act when they take out one of their own in any group, from entertainment to government.

Take note of your actions, consider the mistreatment of the black man lately.  Will you curse at him, yell, abuse, or use your brother?  Notice the times he has done these things to you.  The push to get him out of any group, household, or elsewhere becomes great depending on the offenses.  The victim has a choice he can walk away, put up a fight, self-destruct, or find greener pasture.  Whatever your experience has been with a black man, you know what you did or didn't do to help drive him to that choice.

I caution readers to avoid the pity party during this tough time for our black brothers and also keep away from the temptation to enable them just because you feel threatened by them or worry about what they might do to you.  Black men are under trial, not for what they did, but what they don't do.  A black man's pride has cost him marriages, children, money, position, car, real estate, friends, and more.  When it is all said and done, this less than human status by racists will give many people the strength to come back to their rightful places.  What a black man didn't learn from those who marched before him, he will learn from viewing his fallen brother out in the middle of the street.

Em Hotep.

Nicholl McGuire 


ENCORE When Mothers Don't Cry - Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired

The Narcissist

The Narcissist is a poem by self-published author and web content producer Nicholl McGuire.

If you are a single woman, then most likely you have ran into this kind of man.  Enjoy!

Have Never Been in Love with My Lovers' Minds


6 signs you are living under a curse

Cosby Would Have Been a Bold Voice in the Community About Ferguson

An actor with decades of experience in the entertainment industry, a father figure, and opinionated when it came to speaking real truth about our people, Bill Cosby could have, should have, and would have had something to say about Ferguson.  He lost a son via a shooting.  Some said he sold out for fame many years ago and others looked at past events and called them "unfortunate, disappointing..."  But whatever the personal view on all that has recently come out full throttle about Cosby, he and his connections would have been significant in organizing protests, pushing agendas toward change, and getting the attention of those in powerful positions.  He could have got other entertainers on board--those not fearful of the establishment, uncaring about the elite power structure in the entertainment industry, and too old to worry about what "they think..." But...

What is in darkness comes out in the light sooner or later, doesn't it?  At a time when once again the African American community is being attacked by unseen organizations using triggers like: interracial relationships between white women and black men paraded in mass media, civil disobedience, gun violence, whore images, animal references, and big, scary black man related stuff, those that could speak out against such psychological tactics are shut down before they can even think about protesting. 

People of all ethnicities would have listened to what Cosby had to say and may have joined a movement (if he had one) when it came to black family issues and how stereotypical images are still prevalent in media whether overt or covert.  The root of the matter wasn't with the young man lying face down in the street, the real issues was what led up to him walking in the street in the first place--taking a chance with his life.  Our parents warned many of us, "Don't play out in the street!"  There was a far deeper meaning to what they said then we realized.  Being out in the street puts you in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Many black males and females have gone to early graves due to being idle--having nothing to do but roam the streets.

What few bold African American speakers who have national as well as international attention due to movies, music, art and more they have done, are quiet.  Understandably so, entertainers can't use their platforms to move any personal agendas without compromising their contracts.  They can't say what they want when they want that is why most remain silent when major issues happen.  If all folks (not just blacks) would stop watching their movies, buying their music, wearing their clothing, and supporting these quiet folks, both white and black, maybe they would convince their superiors "...that it isn't in the best interest of my career to remain quiet on issues that my fans obviously care about."  Rather than sing praises about their work, how about bombard their social networking accounts with the hard questions like: What do you think about...and why haven't you said anything...and didn't you do a movie do you feel now?" 

But those in powerful positions know full well what an impact an entertainer will have on a community; therefore, they silence them.  "Keep quiet or else.  Your opinion is not needed.  Don't get yourself are doing well in your career, don't mess it up siding with those ignorant, ghetto folks."

I shudder at the thought  that one day it will take the murder of an A-list black celebrity over a senseless act by a white person for the outcry to be strong enough for law-makers to want to do some things differently.  We aren't talking about playing with civil rights, testing new equipment, changing the face of the police department in a local area, and other related agendas, but a closer look at how to deal with the racist, money-hungry fraternal groups that still govern various communities.  What would happen if their hearts and pockets were hit all at once?

So it is safe to say that Cosby (as well as others) would have been a good speaker to ease tensions when it came to Ferguson and might have done well influencing the African American communities all across our land to pause and think before they reacted to the court ruling, but some group thought of that beforehand. 

On a side note:  these celebrities are given the green light to talk about voting knowing full well the outcomes are predetermined, but they can't do much else then to send a careful tweet or some sign language when it comes to real issues!

Nicholl McGuire


The Rise of Prejudice Feelings

There are times when I am prejudice, angry, and wish not to speak to someone who can't relate to being black.  The stirring of these emotions usually takes place when I see yet another image of someone or something that is simply wrong, or I experience unfair treatment because of a non-black's superiority complex or preconceived notions of who he or she thinks I am. 

From a young black male gunned down by a white police officer to yet another black male marrying for opportunity, what I thought was long put away, shows up in prejudice feelings.  The stomach churns, the attitude on my face frowns, and the need to be anywhere but where I am when I see the foolishness before my eyes rises up.

I contemplated this issue of prejudice not that long ago and I was disappointed with myself.  After years of feeling like I was colorless and content with just being a human being, a series of events reminded me once again of that black girl looking back at me in the mirror.  The one who helped grandma clean rich white folks homes, who dated someone for years who wasn't black, who lived in a dorm with three white young women, and who also lived with a white family for almost a year.  Where were these feelings coming from like:  anger, sadness, and bitterness over issues in media that had nothing to do with me?  I had learned from white people, been blessed by them, and partnered with them personally and professionally, but...

I reflected back on what I said many times before on this blog and elsewhere, the manipulation of news media brainwashing is indeed alive and well.  Its focus is to get us to do things that will further hidden agendas by those who are beyond prejudice, but racist to the core!  Remind me enough times that I am everything but a human being and I will begin to hate the ones who keep telling me the same thing over and over again.  But what is intelligent about controlling one's mind to act prejudice-- to the point of creating chaos-- is that the ones who are doing the most oppressing doesn't look like "them--those white people"rather, they are black people doing it to black people.  They are trained puppet masters spreading the poison they have been fed through all sorts of media outlets.  They say and do things to arise the prejudice within.  If I don't want to talk about so-called black issues, they are going to say things in such a way to make me want to talk about black issues.  If I don't want to be a part of the black group, they are going to remind me why I can't get into the white group.  If I want to make some changes and step out of my comfort zone, they are going to tell me why I won't be a success because of this white person, white group, white location, white whatever!

So I go back to the drawing board of ridding myself of the ugliness that comes with being prejudice.  Usually this consists of shutting off all negative media related to black issues.  Avoiding conversation with angry black folks.  Keeping away from ignorant people of all ethnicities that feel they are authorized to comment on things just because they know someone who is black. 

Prejudice rears its ugly head when someone that doesn't look like you comes around.  The expectation that a non-black is going to say or do something that is going to anger you is ever present when you are prejudice.  Then of course, the distrust of "those people"--never knowing what they are up to even when they could care less about you--but prejudice creates a degree of paranoia.  Prejudice is also prevalent when you don't agree with what you see in front of you or when you suspect that someone is favoring a person over you.  The negativity is binding and keeps you from experiencing true freedom mentally, physically and spiritually.  While others enjoy their lives, a prejudice person is limiting his or herself because of what he or she has been through; therefore, the past dictates the present and the future.

So my hope is that we all look beyond the mind control of media, keep our minds intact no matter what tragedy is ahead for yet another black person, and most of all, remind ourselves that not everyone is evil.

Nicholl McGuire


Monthly Monster: PMDD - Woman Shares Her Experience

Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (Pmdd) and relationships

Black is Beyond Skin Color - It is a State of Mind, Lifestyle...It is Who You Are!

No matter where you go, what you do, who you connect to, or how much you know, to be black in America is not only the color of one's skin, but it is indeed who you are.  There are those who will never let you be just a person, and if you were to be so ignorant and dismiss this and go along with the colorless ideology, then you will be blind-sided by those who want you to think you are just a man or woman in their eyes.

You are a mere woman or man as long as you do as your told, behave, and don't cause any trouble.  But the day, you hurt a non-black person's daughter, son, offend a parent, or disrespect a leader, the color blind eyes will now see color.  The non-black subconscious mind will remind him or her, "Oh yes, I forgot, he or she is a product of his or her environment.  I should have known better.  He or she can't help but be that way."  It is then that the non-black will either go into, "I will save him or her" or "I must stay away from that angry black man (black woman)."

Some of you who wanted so badly to live colorless have come to the revelation not that long ago when you saw the image of yet another black male lying in the street like roadkill.  Did you think, "What a shame a man was killed?"  or "Did you think another black male killed by a white police officer?"  When you add color to what you saw, it hits home.  You know black, grew up black, and you were taught by white most likely.  Something within rises up in you possibly anger, sadness, or a feeling like you were deceived depending on how you view white people, their lifestyle, etc.  For some, white people are your friends, they would never hurt you, they love you...but for others you know better because you have been hurt far too many times by white people.

Those with a hidden agenda capitalized off your pain through yet another violent attack.  They wanted you to feel, because many of you hadn't.  You became numb, insensitive, and accepted "it is what it is."  But it was in their best interest to get a rise in you because they want you to stay traumatized.  Too many black Americans look good on television.  They are wealthy, marrying white, talking white, acting white, swinging hair around like their see to be white is far beyond skin tone too.  They see some of you blacks behaving like them and they don't like it no more than a black woman watching a black man treating a white woman better than he ever did her.  The racist wealthy don't like you black folks.

There have been outspoken leaders crying out loud that our people are sick and unfortunately many are.  They have been brainwashed badly to the point that they can't see their own faults.  They rather run away from the truth through electronic devices, sex, drugs, alcohol, etc.  Years of doing this and they never fully come back into their right minds; therefore, they walk around with the side effects of far too much weed-smoking, alcohol abusing, womanizing, child birthing, and more.  All have their own share of issues.  Some women go mad after childbirth.  Others lose it after a heartbreak.  Men fight with others over trivial matters due to a mind that just can't think like it use to.  It's all so very sad, but when it becomes a "black" issue, now we are talking about systematic racism, oppression, poverty, pride, rejection, and more.  Whether you call yourself, black or African American the issues are still there.  Elitist whites look on, wondering what will these troubled folks do, will they benefit our agenda or will they sabotage it?  They watch what their efforts have done.

So when you feel that urge to disassociate from the black within, "that street" side some like to describe it as, don't.  For what is on the inside, deep within, free of superficial programming, is what is real.  It boils down to survival of the fittest.  If you are comfortable with being an African American or black person and are willing to understand all that comes with being what you are, you will adapt.  You won't need to run anywhere to get people to validate you.  The temptation to self-hate just won't be there. 

The ghetto or "street" type, that so many educated African Americans try to run from, is going to fight for truth.  He or she is going to have your back even when you don't deserve it from the street to the boardroom.  However, this has got to change, sell-out blacks should be kicked out of black circles.  Unlike all-too-forgiving African Americans, non-blacks will disown, ridicule, and even kill off their weak links.  They don't support them especially when they have done a disservice to their people.

In closing, if there is anything you take away from this piece is this, be reminded that being an African American or black is beyond skin tone as much as some would like to trivialize this. You quickly realize this when you see how society still unfairly treats so many of us in AmeriKKKa.

Nicholl McGuire


Black preacher makes a shocking admittance

This Business of "We" Should Be "I" First - Prove Yourself!

"We need to..." this is the start of many sentences when seated amongst African Americans in meetings.  From building up wealth to bringing people to Christ, "We need to...We ought to...We got to...We should..."  But "We" aren't interested.  Some might be and even fewer will actually do something.  However, this business of "We" is something that will not take place for many selfish, prideful, and resentful people who rather talk about what "We got..." in their little circles than what "We" will do to help "We" being the majority.

I have noticed this sort of behavior with the financially deceptive so-called business men and women I have been around who have inflated their incomes and sold pipe dreams.  These people, who are barely making it, struggling to keep homes, cars, marriages together, etc. try hard to sell you on dreams, but aren't successful at making too much of anything really happen. 

These deceivers join or start a variety of businesses both on and offline in the hopes of making it big one day and attempt to persuade you to invest in them.  They sell you on false promises and encourage you to "...hope for the best..." while beckoning you to jump on board.  When you finally believe in them and jump on the bandwagon, the results are dismal.  Of course, when you start asking in-depth questions and want to keep tabs on efforts, they come up with excuses.  In time, you learn that the business strategies they are using are not well-thought out, outdated, or never existed.  Then you learn, they have no jaw-dropping figures that they have attained and that in some cases what they did get was illegal or unethical.  These braggarts are also not "connected" to the movers and shakers like they claim.

So I leave you with this, until we can get to "We," show yourself strong in the community of "I" first.  One should not be trying to recruit anyone into believing any hype until there are proven results that business efforts are indeed working!  Further, if business is truly doing well, then one should have no problem giving seed money to help others start their businesses.

Nicholl McGuire 


How to Meditate the Word of God

The Bible instructs us to meditate on God's words day and night.  Watch the example.


Demonic Opposition

What happened
soulful, real
love light?

Prayed with all one's might.
Spiritual, unique
a mystic.

Coveted by others,
beautiful women,
handsome brothers.

What went wrong?
The joy drained from song.

Messengers of a Creator
gave people hope.
Ancestors hung from a rope.

A people didn't realize their power,
no reverence for a holy rain shower.
Today, walking in the last hour.

Rebels, liars,
into foolishness,
traded happiness,
lost contentment.

Angry at what use-to-be,
can't see,
no time to teach,
don't want to preach.

Walking dead,
respect to a dark god
for monies gained.

What is up with the show?
Pretend to care,
but glare.

Always got a plan,
but don't take any stand.

Fearful of what others will do,
if stray out the box
and threaten to sue.

Brainwashed to attack those in light,
always looking to fight.

Watch everything in sight,
wondering, "What's on tonight?"

Enslaved by a modern day slave master,
who wants his slaves to work faster.

Turning brother against sister
to raise an IQ
mixed races of more than a few.

Lost soul in a dark hole,
played with spirits of ole'.

Don't know what to do,
when they come for you.

Demonic opposition,
believe the lie.

Nicholl McGuire


August Wilson Museum in Pittsburgh Bought by Dollar Bank

Bought for just under $2,000, the August Wilson Museum is now owned by Dollar Bank.  Read more here:

How Colorism Plays a Part in Your Relationship

When you decided to date someone, did you choose this person not only because you liked their personality, but also because you were attracted to a certain skin hue?  Did you grow up hearing things about how a particular color or type is prettier than the other?  Do you tend to act differently toward one skin hue or another, because of some issues you have on the inside or some unresolved feelings from the past?

Sometimes a moment of self-evaluation will open a Pandora's box of why we make the decisions we make when it comes to selecting mates for future relationships.  Men or women who have yet to mature when it comes to having quality relationships and friendships with others will unfortunately make decisions based on petty reasons to be with someone.  Whether it is the way one's eye color looks, skin tone, hair texture, or something similar, the man or woman who very much wants a mate will consider things like this more important than having an honest, loving, and committed partnership.

Have you ever heard someone say something like, "I got with her because I really liked the color of her eyes?  I had babies with him, because I wanted them to be light-skin."  If you have, how did this make you feel?  This sort of talk wrecks havoc on relationships.  It speaks to just how ignorant and immature a person still is when it comes to getting to know someone.  Some will tolerate domestic abuse just to remain with a fine-looking man or woman because they just love the way they look.  Others will sacrifice much just to say they are friends with someone who has a favored skin tone! 

Black isn't just "black" as much as some would like to simplify things by focusing on the color of one's skin.  People come with their share of experiences when they enter a new relationship.  One's personal black experience living in America just might not be yours or mine.  Your preference in music, style, and other things may not be the same as someone who might have the same hair texture as yours.  Those who have a variety of cultures, backgrounds, customs, etc. don't communicate the same as "black" whatever that might mean to you.  Blacks who have a limited view on one another and are not open to accepting the depth that comes with being, all mixed up, will have trouble getting along with that person they like to say, "He black like me...She blaaack!"  Yes, but are you able to identify with that individual's blackness?

Not that long ago, there was a man in the news who was a criminal.  His mug shot was posted everywhere.  He was a nice-looking, light skin, green-eyed African American male.  The women who commented were so impressed with his looks that they couldn't care less what crime he did.  As much as we would like to just look the other way, the reaction of so many African American women and men about how attractive this law-breaker looked speaks to how wild our people still are about what looks attractive to them.

Parents, grandparents and other elders have brainwashed some sons and daughters into thinking that they will get the best of this if they look this way and that, and if they marry this skin tone and that one.  Unfortunately, these mind-controlled folks learn the hard way that a relationship requires more than what meets the eye.  Those that marry based on skin tone (among other things) will soon find out just how shallow their reasons for being with someone truly is.  Sometimes you find that things like:  desperation, control, envy, and more show up in the relationship because the person who finds skin hue highly important feels like he or she must compete with other on-lookers.  In time, the dark skin man who sought after the light skin woman discovers that he should have been looking beyond her color and body-build and the same holds true for the dark skin woman as well when it comes to a light-skin man.  

It doesn't hurt to play in your own lane or stick to your own kind--so to speak, there is nothing wrong with that as much as some would like to make us think otherwise, because of their own freaky agendas.  Sometimes relationships do well because they are free of the complications that come with having to deal with light skin and dark skin hang-ups within and beyond.  There are also the insecurities, jealousy, and resentment that some couples bring into the relationship because they are not content with who they are personally and professionally.

Families aren't always supportive of someone who is light or dark skin joining them and can make matters worse especially if the one with the different skin hue acts in unflattering ways.  From eye-rolls to deep sighs, family members can be rude especially when a relative brings someone around the family that "don't look black..." it can all be so very draining.  In time, the prejudicial ways of not only relatives, but a partner as well, can make one desire to break up especially when eyes are wandering elsewhere seeking a new skin hue to wet one's appetite.

If you are dealing with your share of issues that include things related to skin tone, don't worry there are many like yourself living in a society that still tends to favor certain skin hues over others.  However, when black people stop getting excited about this skin color and that one while avoiding the temptation to teach children what is supposedly prettier, it is then when we can truly feel comfortable in our own skin.

Nicholl McGuire



Schizophrenia in the Media

The Best Advice Dr. Maya Angelou Has Ever Given—and Received - Super Sou...

"I'm Not Asking, I'm Telling You to Go" When Relationships Take an Ugly Turn

He said that he loved her, would take care of her, and help his woman through a tough time, but his empty promises have left  her bitter.

She claimed that she was a good woman, and would appreciate her man, and love him, but it wasn't that long ago when she was spotted kissing another dude.

There comes a point when the threats of breaking up, become real!  "I'm not asking you to go, I'm telling you to!" a partner says.  There is no more hoping, praying, wishing, and waiting for someone to change, you just draw the line in the sand!  Enough is enough!  Yet, our people, that is black folks, will keep beating a dead horse so to speak.  Some will literally beat one another up!

For days, weeks, and even years, a couple will cut each other the eye, lie to one another, bad-mouth each other, and cheat, while still promising to be that "good man" or woman to one another.  The cycle of emotional and physical abuse goes around and around.  He hits her, he apologizes, then he treats her nicely for a time, and then they are back at it again.  "I hate you!  I wish your ugly a^* would just leave!  Stop coming around!  Go to that b*tch!  Leave me alone!"  Then the screaming match ends, both individuals separate for a time, and then one day they see one another.  "Hey, how you doing?  Looking good.  What you been up to?  How about we get together and catch up?"  The door is open then Crazy and Stupid get back together again while hoping relatives and friends give their blessings.

If this sounds like your relationship, sorry I don't mean to offend, but everybody needs a wake up call every now and then.  Someone in the maze of break up to make up has to stop the game-playing and ask one's self the hard questions, "What is wrong with me that I keep letting this person back in my life again?  Why do I believe what he/she tells me when I know that it is a lie?  Why do I feel the need to be with someone right now?  Is my life just that bad?  Can I do some things differently?"

Many educated African American men and women could do so well in life if they didn't have partners who were envious, bitter, broken, angry, and more.  Some of these couples are mentally disturbed.  Years of drug use have corrupted their minds and bodies.  So a person who is illogical, irrational, and ignorant is not someone who has a proper understanding of what a functional relationship looks like.  Sure, they might know how to pass a college exam, but when it comes to Relationship 101, they are dumb.  The only thing they can do is think of people they know or watch television shows to get some idea of what a healthy relationship looks like.  Then they attempt to emulate what they see and far too often their efforts are an epic failure!

When the time comes to have "the talk," be sure that if you are the one who is in a dysfunctional  relationship with a troubled individual that you are indeed ready to leave.  So many people end up creating even more drama for themselves, because they lead a partner on, they act as if they can be friends after being lovers for a time.  This doesn't work when someone is emotionally and physically tied to another to the point that they can't even give the person breathing room. 

Most people who are still in love with their partners will not act rationally at least not in the beginning of a break up, so prepare yourself.  It takes some time to get over someone, but the key is to get over, so you can move on!  "I'm not asking you, I'm telling you to leave...and I don't want you anymore--I mean it this time."  Let your actions, speak louder than your words.

Nicholl McGuire, see other writings here.  Listen to audio here.


Sissy, Punk, and Mama's Boy - When Junior has His Daddy's Ways

Unfortunately as a child, I heard male relatives raised by their moms and grandma be called things like, "Sissy, Punk, Mama's Boy..." and also that other word that begins with an "F."  It was sad to watch a few of these boys walk away from adult bullies with tears in their eyes while others tried to prove they were tough with fists up.

As I grew older, I could see why some of those boys turned men were called such bad names.  It was as if they lived what they had been called out.  The Sissy was just like the women he grew up around.  The Punk would back down from any confrontation.  The Mama's Boy was always doing what his Mama told him even when he didn't want to and sometimes he acted just like his Mama.

Although the issues were real and true, the name-calling was unnecessary.  Funny, some of these young males had their daddy's name!  So there was a deep-rooted anger there with some of the fathers.  Junior didn't turn out to be like his daddy or he was either too much like his daddy depending on who you spoke to.

As much as I wanted to believe that some of these young men were going to be okay later in life, I later learned of the damage of their fathers not being pro-active in their lives.  Daddy was either too busy chasing skirts, money, or a new opportunity, he didn't believe that he needed to spend quality time with his sons--that was Mama's job.  However, Mama was cooking, cleaning, working outside the home, helping with homework, assisting other relatives, and more, how was she supposed to keep up?  A few too many dads had the luxury of coming home from work and plopping in front of television screens and coming and going as they pleased while leaving an already frustrated and tired mom to care for kids.

There is a serious epidemic within the black community that is still very much present and it always comes back to fathers needing to spend time with children.  The epidemic is no love, no patience, and no time.  The poison spreads into intimate relationships, parenting, work performance, Christian counseling, and more.  When related issues are raised Junior's dad becomes defensive.  He acts rude and threatens to walk away.  He doesn't want to face the truth.  He places blame, fights with the mother of his children, and takes out some of his issues on others.  He believes that a drink, a new woman, and more money will solve every problem he has including a poor relationship with his children. 

It is my prayer that African American men who have watched their prideful, selfish and ignorant fathers over the years handle women, money, children, and more will stop deceiving themselves!  Stop believing that emulating and being obedient to the man who called you a Sissy, Punk or Mama's Boy will heal the absence of love within. You just can't win a father's love by acting abusive mentally and physically like him to those who really do mean you well.  Humble yourself and love and respect your wife/baby's mom and children--it isn't their fault for why you feel the way that you do about family.  Lastly, be genuinely active in your children's lives (not just for lights and cameras, public opinion and holidays), life is too short!

Nicholl McGuire also maintains Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate blog.


Black Women: Favoring Black Men, Hating their Sisters

They will give a man the pass, make a deal, sleep with him, befriend the player, and all the while hate their own kind, black women who favor men. 

"I just can't get along with women...I can't stand them...I mean I can tolerate some females, but you know how they can be."  These women-hating women are the ones who will not cut any slack when it comes to dealing with women in fields like:  customer service, hospitality, childcare, publishing, law, manufacturing, housekeeping, and any other industry.  They just love men!  They favor them so much that they will even risk their jobs just to cut a man a break!

When a woman who has the same problem/concern that a man has approaches the women-hating type, she will cut him slack on a bill, give him the best part of the meat, serve him with a smile, laugh at his jokes, and offer him additional assistance including sex.  But when it comes to her sister, her attitude is negative, she doesn't care much about the quality of work she is providing, and will not bend the rules under any circumstances to help her sister like she did her brother.

These women, who favor men, often find themselves having to:  cover up their schemes, unfair treatment, gift-giving, trickery, and more.  They will throw anyone under the bus who questions their actions.  They are typically careful about hiding their true feelings about other women, but sometimes they slip up in the way that they respond to other women.  A happy greeting toward a man and small talk, quickly leaves when she is expected to perform the same action with a woman.  She is often fault-finding when it comes to women at the workplace, church, and even in her own family.  She will lie or exaggerate stories to cover for a man she has "hooked up."  She will pretend as if she treats everyone the same.

Watch out for women who are all smiles when it comes to men and all frowns when it comes to their own kind.  The minute you cross them, they will find a way to pay you back.  It is best not to accept their so-called favors. 

Nicholl McGuire  


Spiritual Schizophrenia - Good and Evil at War - Pigs in the Parlor

Selfish, Controlling Black Folk Pushing and Pulling Relatives and Friends

Consider what the agenda might be of a loved one or friend who insists, "You don't go here...Stay there...Don't marry this one, choose that one...Buy that, put this one back...and Give me this and you keep that."  Right away, you might recognize someone you know.  But the agenda, what might it be?  To get you to do what they want.  Selfish, controlling, ignorant black folk on a mission to push you when it suits them and pull you back to them when it is convenient.  Some will drive you far away, so much in fact that you never want to see certain relatives and friends again in life--nothing wrong with that!

Some of the most successful people in this world whose relatives said, "You will need me one good will come to you if you forget about me..." funny, good stuff just keeps happening to the black sheep of the family. 

Selfish, controlling people with little going on for themselves and far too much time on their hands to think about everyone else, work out plans in their heads to benefit them.  They think of what they are going to say to you the next time you come around.  Bring up the past whether what you said was good, bad or otherwise, they will comment, suggest, advise, and hopefully control you in a way that you will feel obligated or guilty to do something for them while reminding you of their titles.

Holidays can bring the worst out in ignorant black folk who are still mad about one thing or another.  Knowing that they are to be on their best behavior in front of certain family and friends (you know the ones they think they might get something from), they will talk in a way that sounds like they respect thoughts/beliefs/plans/decisions when they really don't.  Sooner or later someone will reveal the truth about Mama, Auntie and Unc's sudden interest in you.

When one desires to break from toxic relatives, pushy friends, and everyone else in between who is controlling, the main thing you don't do is cave into the pressure.  You don't go back to family when you really don't want to go back.  You don't argue with them over something you know is meant to get you to react.  You allow space and your desire to be free from negative situations to motivate you to do something different in your life.  Before long, you won't have to worry anymore about petty people and petty things!

Nicholl McGuire author of Know Your Enemy: The Christian's Critic


Celebrities Speak Out, Truth Revealed: 20,000,000 Sacrifice Club

Narcissistic Parents and the Damaging Effects - Look to Children to Be Their Servants

The young, wise African American speaker in this video speaks about this issue of parents who expect children to be servants.  This is all-too-common in many African American households.  "I did for you, and now you have to do for me!"  When rejected or not being available when they want, these parents will create unnecessary drama in the family such as: bad-mouthing their sons and daughters to their faces or behind their back, ignoring them when they are in need, be-littling them, suppressing them, abusing them, acting impatiently, etc. --none of these behaviors demonstrate love!  Listen and learn especially African Americans who have been raised by narcissistic parents.  Ask questions of parents and don't submit to things you know are not right.  Parents: Lead by example!

Umar Johnson, Message To Black Women About Dating & Relationships



Spoiling Yourself and Children is a Problem - Wealthy Christians Take Heed

A Bloodline of Deceit -- When Your Ancestry DNA Reveals the Truth

Some African Americans won't bother with genealogy research, because they already know just how bad relatives were in the past.  Most likely, someone in the family might have told them about a great, great grandmother who was once a prostitute instead of proving a wish that she be a queen or a great, great, great grandfather being nothing more than a convict. 

For some relatives, family history is unimportant, they rather forget the past, ignore the present, and get on with the future.  But when you keep seeing the same pattern repeat itself, especially when it involves you or your children, you have to address the issues and it would help to find out why is it that one's roots is filled with so much deceit.  Could it have been the environment and or influence in the community?  The DNA?  The lack of resources and education, etc.?  Maybe it was all of the above, so how does one work to improve his or her family bloodline particularly when it is full of deceit?  It starts with a strong desire to improve self, expose lies, and strive to do better with the family you already have sometimes this means cutting certain people, places and things off!  Being a family doesn't mean putting up with abusive behaviors and continuing teachings that are no longer beneficial and have been known to create division and un-forgiveness.

From lies to baby mama drama's cries, some ancestors may not have bothered to stay out of trouble, because they lacked the know how and the motivation to want to do better, but as one uncle told me, "Trouble always followed me."  How about he wasn't interested in staying away from trouble once it showed its ugly face?  Another relative went to her grave without making peace on this side and wanted to try to make amends on the other side--it was too late.

A long list of relatives who continue, even insist, on surrounding themselves with problems procreate problems i.e.) The Problem Child, Menace to Society, etc.   They just love being around those who have limited their survival to "hustling, getting by, living just another day..." while flossing jewelry, boasting about wardrobes, homes and cars.  When does one look beyond the material?  With this kind of mentality, no matter how cool it sounds, it isn't any wonder why generations experience jail time, bad relationships, terrible health, destructive habits, and more.  When new blood isn't interested in doing better than old blood, then the cycle only repeats itself. 

After spending much time interviewing relatives, checking my family history online, and still piecing some things together, I started noticing negative patterns and I couldn't help but think, "No wonder, some groups want so bad to end whatever is causing a family line to keep producing problem folks."  History shows that those who ponder this issue of families with generational problems/curses had been trying everything from promoting the assimilation of different races in better neighborhoods to interracial marriages.  The public as well as secret groups hope that the African American man and woman (and others like them), with a long bloodline of mental and physical challenges will stop thinking and acting in ways that are not productive to humanity.  As demeaning as it sounds or even strange, the reality is that if one comes from a lineage of deceit, there is always the possibility that someone or many will perpetuate what has been learned from that bloodline.  However, it is just in some people to be evil.  They don't have to be taught, they just are! 

If great, great granddad was a murdering pimp, player and hustler, he may have recruited those after him to be that same way.  Unfortunately, those coming after the evil teacher share what they learn with their children and so on until someone in the bloodline stops the negative behaviors.  For some who can see the destructive patterns clearly in one's family, it took moving to another land and intermixing with those who were far different in the hope that the IQ would be higher, upbringing better, and the negative influence of toxic relatives gone.  It was a matter of survival for those who didn't want to perpetuate destructive generational cycles and yearned for better opportunities, hence the moving and the intermixing throughout the lands.

Once a family historian has found the information that strikes his or her spirit in a way that only he or she can explain, it would make sense to do whatever it takes to make one's family from this day forward:  morally better, spiritually stronger, and physically well.

Nicholl McGuire


Pin Us!

Black Business Women Online

Join Nicholl at the Black Business Women Online Site here.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


African American Planet Blog Topics

african american spirituality african american relationships african american celebrities african american family poems african american men african american parents spiritual african americans african american women black music manipulative media money relationships white american racism african american be encouraged dating black history african american hairstyles african american poets family issues Barack Obama african american achievers african american business african american mothers african american thoughts african american health issues black history month racism abuse african american music domestic violence education gospel music african american churches african american documentaries african american history african american lifestyle african american movies american holidays narcissism africa african american dating african american friendships african american scholarships black women first black president interracial relationships not african american self hate soul food white people african american bloggers african american children african american entertainment african american fathers african american travel black business blog owner ghetto slavery african american christian women african american christians african american education african american elite african american haircare african american leaders african american news angry black man angry black woman freemasons mind control shopping spiritual warfare african american authors african american books african american culture african american museums african american skin care african american writers ancestry black american racism black celebrities black celebrity masons black love black skin cheating civil rights ignorant black people martin luther king barack obama mental issues about us absent fathers african american deceivers african american inventors african american marriages african american media african american statistics african american television networks african american workers african americans and africans angry blacks black grandmothers dark skin death fraternal organizations friendships illuminati prejudice president barack obama rb music groups religion sex travel abusive women african american communities african american magazines african american occult african american preachers african american speakers african american wigs african americans workplace angry black women black american ignorance black education black greek organizations black panthers party black preachers black racists black singles blacks with an attitude celebrities and god crazy blacks funny stuff hip hop culture jealous women love michael jackson natural disasters obama campaign postpartum depression president elect barack obama racial problems racist republicans secret societies unemployment voter privacy youtubers Obama a abusive men african american art african american audio books african american beauty african american brothers african american community african american cuisine african american dating sites african american dining african american drama african american genealogy african american hair loss african american heritage african american holidays african american home owners african american homosexuality african american idols african american lawyers african american mental illness african american music videos african american natural hair african american political prisoners african american religion african american researchers african american russia african american self-hate african american sex african american soldiers african american toys african american voters african americans jail african consciousness aunt tammy big girls biracial people black athletes black dating services black inventors black men and white women black people attitude black stereotypes blessings and curses boule brainwashed blacks children activities chris brown controlling black folks controlling men controlling women difficult people down low celebrities faith fema camps financial assistance funny black people gay black men gossip government homosexuals internet dating laboring to love an abusive mate liars light skin lottery menopause military music videos obese black people old school pedophilia positivity post traumatic slave syndrome poverty prayers schizophrenia self esteem senator barack obama skin bleaching sports surveys twitter uncle tom whistleblowers African American parade African American producers African American women in science Haiti Obama sworn in abortion affirmative action african american bookstores african american chinese african american clothing styles african american drug dealers african american gamers african american gifts african american girls african american gods african american grandparents african american grants african american heterosexuality african american korea african american latin america african american ministers african american models african american online surfing african american opinion african american paintings african american photographers african american photography african american police officers african american population control african american prostitution african american radio shows african american samoan african american singles african american skincare african american sons african american studies african american thinking african american tips african american transhumanists african american weaves african american women groups african american women inventors african american women makeup african americans respect african americans workers african art african decor african food african history anger management angry atlanta bisexual black men black English people black alliance for just immigration black american quotations black art websites black attitudes black celebrity children black cinema black conscious community black conscious women black dolls black elite groups black feminists black leadership black men black national anthem black nationalism black people and summer time black population control black radio stations black scholars black sitcoms black toys boxer break ups childhood childless women chris rock christina milian civil war classic black movies classism cold-blooded african americans colorism communication community assistance confrontation construction in haiti constructive criticism counselors dating violence deceased black legends depression diversity eastern stars ebola educated blacks effeminate african american men elderly black folks employment eugenics exes false flags fat african americans fearful blacks food stamps fools free stuff french african funny african americans funny black man funny black woman generational curses gifted african americans going green good black men haiti earthquake haiti fault line happiness harlem helpful links hidden medical experiments high blood pressure highly sensitive blacks hip hop fashion hip hop satanism honest black folk housing assistance how to approach a black woman how to get exposure on this site hurricane relief insecure women internet israel jamaicans jealous men juneteenth keep it real kwanzaa loud mouth blacks lynching malcom x manhood manmade earthquakes memorial day michael jackson children mother michelle obama mike tyson mike tyson daughter minority women scholarships misogyny moors motivation multiracial celebrities music lyrics negro spirituals nelson mandela nicole richie nonblack offended blacks overweight african americans paranoid patience patti labelle paula abdul perimenopause police poor african americans population control prideful prostate cancer and black men reality shows recycling relatives reprobate mind revenge reverse discrimination rhianna rich african americans samples and trials scary blacks self righteous sexual harassment siblings skull and bones slow jams social issues social networking sociopaths sometimey black folks strange black folks superstition terri seymore the man tired black man tired black woman trends unemotional ungrateful black folks voodoo war white perspective on african american issues wisdom women friends work at home

Dating Advice, Relationship Problems?

Dating Advice, Relationship Problems?
Like this blog? Check this one out too!

Blog Dash

African American View on You Blogger/Owner

African American Planet Blog

African American Planet Blog
Writer, Poet, Author, Speaker, Virtual Assistant Nicholl McGuire
Creative Commons License
African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.