Showing posts with label african american men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label african american men. Show all posts
Tuesday
Midlife Mean - African American Men with Low T
Their women don’t understand. Their friends joke. The
African American men who silently suffer with erectile dysfunction along with
hormonal changes either don’t know what is happening or refuse to admit that
there is something wrong.
Past relationships end without notice. Bodily pain shows up
where there wasn’t any problems before. Hair thins, muscles lose mass and belly
fat increases. A man looks in the mirror one day and no longer likes what he
sees. No matter how hard he tries he doesn’t feel or look good. His memory at
times doesn’t function at the rate it once did and sometimes he has moments
where he feels like he is out of control. He is more sensitive about issues
whereas before he could care less.
What do African American men do who experience so much
mental and physical change? Well for some they project their issues onto
others. They find fault with loved ones. They lash out on people without
thinking about the consequences and just think it all is tied to what I
describe “Midlife Mean.” African American men who are angry but not due to what
many think like societal challenges. Sure there is cause to be frustrated about
many things, but there are other factors that have little to do with a brother
being locked up or gunned down again. A man is getting older and he doesn’t
like what is happening to him is secretly more important to a number of men
more than what we think.
Consider those men that suddenly make huge life changes with
the excuse that they just want something different. Yet, upon closer inspection
of their so-called self improvement efforts it looks more like self
destruction. These males go off and do the unthinkable. For some their
undiagnosed health problems turn into challenges for others and no one bothers
to think that many of these men 40 plus are going through some personal woes.
Women are more likely to talk about things like premenstrual syndrome,
perimenopause and menopause with doctors, relatives and friends, but men in
general will avoid most topics related to their body. They don’t want to snitch
on themselves. So the male who is experiencing midlife mean related symptoms
flies under the radar and presents to others only what he feels is necessary to
cover or mask what is really going on with him.
Some men aren’t cheating just because, lying for the sport
of it, hiding pain for nothing, or blaming wives and girlfriends for almost any
and everything, there is a bigger story behind the “I’m good…just fine. I don’t
need any help.” If you or someone you know is going through fluctuating mood
swings, experiencing dark thoughts, finding irrational fault with people at
home and elsewhere, and overall not acting like self, encourage that man to get
some help.
Nicholl McGuire is the owner and manager of this blog.
Wednesday
Tuesday
Why is a Troubled Black Man Sitting Down When He Should Be Standing Up?
"Not bothered, don't care...got too much to do. Ain't my business..." some stable-minded black men say when the truth is presented before them. "I wasn't there. I don't know what you are talking about. It wasn't me!" Well do you have a little time to take off the sunglasses, wipe the sleep out the corner of your eyes (both eyes) and wake up?
As we know not every one is innocent in our families or any other family. But for purposes of this blog entry, the focus is on the black man who knows that his family is falling apart, job is coming to an end, kids are acting up, and other personal and professional challenges, and all this brotha can say is, "What do you want me to do about it?" Say what!? Someone teach this man to fight!
Why are some black men often on the go but with no sense of direction when it comes to exactly where they are going to do about lingering problems? Does the angry black man read without being paid to do it? Conduct research for himself and family about whatever their struggles might be? Interview those who know more than he? Build connections with good people who will sincerely come through for him and his family? Does he!? Plenty of our men get into over-priced cars and drive, and drive, and drive some more. Some end up at their mistresses' homes, others at bars and clubs near and far, and still other men end up "chillin" with no-good relatives and friends either on the phone or in-person.
When does the troubled black man make time to work on family related issues, professional dilemmas and similar things, or does he leave that up to his woman/mother/grandmother? Why is he often running behind women to hide from the demons within or having sex with the same sex and hiding texts? Why is he using a lot of words to describe simple matters or no words at all, or stealing someone else's wisdom while acting like the Mad Hatter? Why is he lost in a movie recreating another man or woman's script while hoping/wishing/waiting for a promised ship by handlers that don't bother to tip? Tell me?
Most of us, who are still waking up from years of being asleep to deception, realize that minds are being attacked, families divided, public education, and correction systems systematically separating the weak from the strong, religious manipulation, entertainment distractions, evil political agendas, and other enemy tactics. When one is hit on every side, he can't help but "sit down and relax," so he says. But there is evidence of conscious defeat when he sits in front of a screen for hours and hours and hours. How long does a man pray, talk or make love to his partner, teach (not preach at) children, seek a job he might like, maintain his environment, or fix something around his residence or in the garage?
What are the results of collective conscious media programming on the black man and his kin? Another generation that talks the same talk like their programmed fathers about things they don't bother to question, investigate, protest, or present new and improved plans. More poster children who still haven't come to the realization that they are being misled in every area of their life from health to wealth. The man might be one of the "lucky" ones who owns something, but it won't be long before the owners who own him will want creative control and then will want to one day buy the whole thing from him while continuing to use his name. It's coming sooner or later for our beloved Tyler Perry and others like him.
While everything else has changed in government, why hasn't the two party system changed much over the years? Why keep saying "yes" to things staying the same (although you were deceived into believing change was a coming) by continuing to support groups, systems and individuals you don't like or know very little about?
Why aren't people who honestly want change given the opportunity to be seen in front of the masses rather than puppets especially when it comes to representing this country?
On Entertainment
Why do you continue to listen to music you know isn't the least bit beneficial to your spiritual self and then allow children and grandchildren to listen to "the garbage" around you? Have you noticed that only a certain group is "allowed" to be on billboard charts, become award-winning, receive an Emmy, be presented on television shows, etc.? What about those people in your community who can sing, write, act, dance, create art...? Let's drop the zeros and support our neighborhood heroes! They aren't in the secret clubs with the one-eye connections. I might add, why do so many "idol-worshipping" blacks mimic folks on TV and in film? Can we say mind control?
On Health
What about what you eat or the legal and illegal drugs, supplements and more you or someone you know take, do you know what the side effects are from prolong use? Do you know anything about population control?
On Spirituality
Do you know why black people are hated so much from a spiritual perspective? Do you know your own family roots and why you can't seem to get ahead? Have you heard anything about generational curses?
On Shopping
Why is media always distracting you with yet something else you need to buy? Some of you take "Black" Friday literally when you should be saving your money! How might they be using entertainers to deceive you, control your wallet, and take control over your mind and ultimately your lifestyle?
We can go on and on.
Ask why.
Nicholl McGuire
As we know not every one is innocent in our families or any other family. But for purposes of this blog entry, the focus is on the black man who knows that his family is falling apart, job is coming to an end, kids are acting up, and other personal and professional challenges, and all this brotha can say is, "What do you want me to do about it?" Say what!? Someone teach this man to fight!
Why are some black men often on the go but with no sense of direction when it comes to exactly where they are going to do about lingering problems? Does the angry black man read without being paid to do it? Conduct research for himself and family about whatever their struggles might be? Interview those who know more than he? Build connections with good people who will sincerely come through for him and his family? Does he!? Plenty of our men get into over-priced cars and drive, and drive, and drive some more. Some end up at their mistresses' homes, others at bars and clubs near and far, and still other men end up "chillin" with no-good relatives and friends either on the phone or in-person.
When does the troubled black man make time to work on family related issues, professional dilemmas and similar things, or does he leave that up to his woman/mother/grandmother? Why is he often running behind women to hide from the demons within or having sex with the same sex and hiding texts? Why is he using a lot of words to describe simple matters or no words at all, or stealing someone else's wisdom while acting like the Mad Hatter? Why is he lost in a movie recreating another man or woman's script while hoping/wishing/waiting for a promised ship by handlers that don't bother to tip? Tell me?
Most of us, who are still waking up from years of being asleep to deception, realize that minds are being attacked, families divided, public education, and correction systems systematically separating the weak from the strong, religious manipulation, entertainment distractions, evil political agendas, and other enemy tactics. When one is hit on every side, he can't help but "sit down and relax," so he says. But there is evidence of conscious defeat when he sits in front of a screen for hours and hours and hours. How long does a man pray, talk or make love to his partner, teach (not preach at) children, seek a job he might like, maintain his environment, or fix something around his residence or in the garage?
What are the results of collective conscious media programming on the black man and his kin? Another generation that talks the same talk like their programmed fathers about things they don't bother to question, investigate, protest, or present new and improved plans. More poster children who still haven't come to the realization that they are being misled in every area of their life from health to wealth. The man might be one of the "lucky" ones who owns something, but it won't be long before the owners who own him will want creative control and then will want to one day buy the whole thing from him while continuing to use his name. It's coming sooner or later for our beloved Tyler Perry and others like him.
Start your awakening today!
On VotingWhile everything else has changed in government, why hasn't the two party system changed much over the years? Why keep saying "yes" to things staying the same (although you were deceived into believing change was a coming) by continuing to support groups, systems and individuals you don't like or know very little about?
Why aren't people who honestly want change given the opportunity to be seen in front of the masses rather than puppets especially when it comes to representing this country?
On Entertainment
Why do you continue to listen to music you know isn't the least bit beneficial to your spiritual self and then allow children and grandchildren to listen to "the garbage" around you? Have you noticed that only a certain group is "allowed" to be on billboard charts, become award-winning, receive an Emmy, be presented on television shows, etc.? What about those people in your community who can sing, write, act, dance, create art...? Let's drop the zeros and support our neighborhood heroes! They aren't in the secret clubs with the one-eye connections. I might add, why do so many "idol-worshipping" blacks mimic folks on TV and in film? Can we say mind control?
On Health
What about what you eat or the legal and illegal drugs, supplements and more you or someone you know take, do you know what the side effects are from prolong use? Do you know anything about population control?
On Spirituality
Do you know why black people are hated so much from a spiritual perspective? Do you know your own family roots and why you can't seem to get ahead? Have you heard anything about generational curses?
On Shopping
Why is media always distracting you with yet something else you need to buy? Some of you take "Black" Friday literally when you should be saving your money! How might they be using entertainers to deceive you, control your wallet, and take control over your mind and ultimately your lifestyle?
We can go on and on.
Ask why.
Nicholl McGuire
Sunday
Hen-Pecked, Controlled - The Weak-Minded Man
Laboring to Love an Abusive Mate: Hen-Pecked, Controlled - The Weak-Minded Man: "She's controlling...she doesn't want you to do anything for you...she is so jealous...why do you let her treat you like that?...
Thursday
Today's Black Men Exposed (MUST SEE)
In one word, thought-provoking, this video is a compilation of past political figures, television characters, musicians, Youtubers, and others speaking about issues related to the family, government, money, ancestry, music, parenting, and more for your encouragement. There comes a point in one's life when you have to step back from the foolishness and really look for the messages that resonate, motivate, and cause you to want to do some things differently in your life.
What will it take for some brothas and sistas to see what's wrong in their lives and work to do what's right in every situation--from the baby mama drama to the boss at the workplace? There is something wrong when one defends his or her crutches in life (alcohol, drugs, and cigarettes) knowing full well they are slowly killing he or she. There is something disturbing when one thinks it is okay to fill his or her mind up, as well as children, with sexy music, images, and all things sexual on a daily basis, yet he or she has no clue how to do something as simple as have an intelligent conversation with the opposite sex. You have to wonder what is wrong with a loud-mouth man who often is critical of black women or a crazy woman all-too-ready to jump on a black man.
We live in a world of leaders who systematically put subliminal images before your face for your destruction, place chemicals in your food and drink in the hopes you will die sooner rather than later, and do other things to take you off this planet while they rub your back, shake your hand, and smile in your face. Check videos out like that on YouTube!
Enjoy the above video, check out part two, and post your own exposed video on YouTube or elsewhere, then come back and share your link in comments.
Be encouraged and thanks to ExposureExpo on YouTube for sharing.
Nicholl
Wednesday
Macho Man, Effeminate Male - Where's the Balanced Gentlemen?
Media has created one extreme or another when attempting to tell black men how to be men. If the African American isn't in love with himself and his "boys" then he is parading around acting like a woman. Where are the balanced men in mind, body and spirit? Are they all married or in relationships allowing wives/girlfriends to feminize them or are they standing their ground--protecting households and making wise decisions based on spiritual precepts?
As much as I would love to have something nice to say about mainstream African Americans in media and elsewhere, I look around and I see men looking back at me who have nothing to say, meaningful or otherwise. Mean eyes, negative attitudes (the nerve of some to talk about women), complaints about not being appreciated by their women, too busy to make time for families, while telling their boys, "I love you...we should get together some time." What is wrong with this picture? Something looks and smells weird in the atmosphere.
Real women dash the fantasies of superficial men who dream of luxury cars and homes, strippers, stripper poles, parties, drinks, and drugs. They snap lost men back into a reality that they don't want to face, "When are you getting a job? What have you been doing all day? What are you doing with your money? Whose that b&tch you keep talking to on the Internet and on your phone? Why can't we get ahead and what kind of legal plan can you come up with to help our family?" Some black men will bend over backwards for non-blacks and won't think too much about helping those in their own families who really, truly desire to do something big! A lazy black man or boy with a lot of time on his hands will get he and his family into trouble!
I heard a minister preach a word about what defines a spiritual man. I agreed with the preacher that if a man isn't reading the Holy Bible to help him understand who he is, isn't spending any time with his Creator, and isn't practicing what he is learning, then he has no clue what a spiritual man is! He will falsely assume that what he sees in a weak church is a man or what he observes when seated on his front porch looking at men in the street are real men.
Being tough, rough, and getting a lot of stuff my friends is not a real man! However, a man who has love in his heart, who cares about people, shows he is kind, patient, responsible, accountable to God, and generous with others while exhibiting self-control and honesty is a real man! Real men aren't afraid of hard work! A man who is confident in who he is doesn't need to think and act like a woman! He shouldn't have to fight everyone and everything to prove he loves his family by snapping his fingers, rolling his neck, or switching his behind out of a room while slamming the door behind him! Yet, media is the counselor, teacher, mentor, father, and more to so many macho and effeminate black men and boys who sit in front of television and the Internet for hours day-after-day watching characters in movies and players on fields and courts. Their own fathers, grandfathers, and uncles ain't sayin' nothin' while they watch right along with them! The athlete teaches the man how to treat women like a ball on the field/court and the cowboy/villian/gangster/corrupt leader shows men how to kill another human being emotionally, physically, or spiritually while tearing down an infrastructure.
Opportunities to impart wisdom come and go and the only thing many elders are saying is, "Where you get those shoes, Nephew? Wow, that hair-cut looks nice...Yeah Man, I got this car for a good price, check out my watch too!" If a black man isn't ever quiet, spending some real time to think about his life, and could care less about reading to obtain the knowledge he needs to survive, then it isn't any wonder that his spirit dies followed by his body. A black lover can't save him, his momma becomes tired of talking to him, and his daddy is too busy doing his own thing, so what does he truly have? Himself and a God he may or may not want in his life.
Living in a dying world and all one cares about is what he looks like or what he has is sad--it's pathetic! What's worse is that the very things that a man spends his whole life working and fighting for he doesn't keep in the end. He brought nothing into the world and therefore he can take nothing out, so the holy scriptures tell us.
Those that are seemingly balanced in mind, body and spirit, please do take up some time with the young men and boys and teach them spiritual insight on what it means to be a real man as God defines.
Nicholl McGuire
As much as I would love to have something nice to say about mainstream African Americans in media and elsewhere, I look around and I see men looking back at me who have nothing to say, meaningful or otherwise. Mean eyes, negative attitudes (the nerve of some to talk about women), complaints about not being appreciated by their women, too busy to make time for families, while telling their boys, "I love you...we should get together some time." What is wrong with this picture? Something looks and smells weird in the atmosphere.
Real women dash the fantasies of superficial men who dream of luxury cars and homes, strippers, stripper poles, parties, drinks, and drugs. They snap lost men back into a reality that they don't want to face, "When are you getting a job? What have you been doing all day? What are you doing with your money? Whose that b&tch you keep talking to on the Internet and on your phone? Why can't we get ahead and what kind of legal plan can you come up with to help our family?" Some black men will bend over backwards for non-blacks and won't think too much about helping those in their own families who really, truly desire to do something big! A lazy black man or boy with a lot of time on his hands will get he and his family into trouble!
I heard a minister preach a word about what defines a spiritual man. I agreed with the preacher that if a man isn't reading the Holy Bible to help him understand who he is, isn't spending any time with his Creator, and isn't practicing what he is learning, then he has no clue what a spiritual man is! He will falsely assume that what he sees in a weak church is a man or what he observes when seated on his front porch looking at men in the street are real men.
Being tough, rough, and getting a lot of stuff my friends is not a real man! However, a man who has love in his heart, who cares about people, shows he is kind, patient, responsible, accountable to God, and generous with others while exhibiting self-control and honesty is a real man! Real men aren't afraid of hard work! A man who is confident in who he is doesn't need to think and act like a woman! He shouldn't have to fight everyone and everything to prove he loves his family by snapping his fingers, rolling his neck, or switching his behind out of a room while slamming the door behind him! Yet, media is the counselor, teacher, mentor, father, and more to so many macho and effeminate black men and boys who sit in front of television and the Internet for hours day-after-day watching characters in movies and players on fields and courts. Their own fathers, grandfathers, and uncles ain't sayin' nothin' while they watch right along with them! The athlete teaches the man how to treat women like a ball on the field/court and the cowboy/villian/gangster/corrupt leader shows men how to kill another human being emotionally, physically, or spiritually while tearing down an infrastructure.
Opportunities to impart wisdom come and go and the only thing many elders are saying is, "Where you get those shoes, Nephew? Wow, that hair-cut looks nice...Yeah Man, I got this car for a good price, check out my watch too!" If a black man isn't ever quiet, spending some real time to think about his life, and could care less about reading to obtain the knowledge he needs to survive, then it isn't any wonder that his spirit dies followed by his body. A black lover can't save him, his momma becomes tired of talking to him, and his daddy is too busy doing his own thing, so what does he truly have? Himself and a God he may or may not want in his life.
Living in a dying world and all one cares about is what he looks like or what he has is sad--it's pathetic! What's worse is that the very things that a man spends his whole life working and fighting for he doesn't keep in the end. He brought nothing into the world and therefore he can take nothing out, so the holy scriptures tell us.
Those that are seemingly balanced in mind, body and spirit, please do take up some time with the young men and boys and teach them spiritual insight on what it means to be a real man as God defines.
Nicholl McGuire
Thursday
Still Holding a Special Place in Your Heart for the Pimp
Oh, the memories! Sitting back in your easy chair or seated on a sofa, you are channel surfing. You come across an old film with a black man decorated in a brightly colored suit with a matching hat and a feather sticking out the top. You think of Robin Hood briefly when you look at his hat--stealing from the rich to give to the poor. (Oh, you fed right into the marketers' schemes with that one.) The handsome black man wears boots with a heel which makes him appear a little taller than he is and a little softer than he looks with his button down shirt. It's like he has the appeal of both sexes. (Once again, the marketers got you!) He actually looks fit, better looking than you. (You will be looking more closely at what he has so that you can spend your money on some old back in the day stuff--they got you again!) Walking down the street with two seductively dressed women, the pimp has one white with straight, blond hair and one dark skin with black, curly hair on his arms. They are all headed to a large automobile called a Cadillac--it's long, real long. (How many folks who had some money in your family owned a Cadillac? The car dealership drained their wallets for years on a car that they most likely didn't get pay off before having an accident.) The front hood is large enough to lay a few bodies on it and the trunk big enough to put a few dead ones in it.
While watching a scene on TV similar to the one described in real life, you look over at your older relative, the one who use to know a pimp or two from the '70s, and he has a stupid grin on his face with eyes glued on the screen. The only smile you have seen on his face all day. Yeah, he's across the room re-living his youth admiring a pimp, now re-read that last line. It's not a doctor, scholar, lawyer, teacher, preacher, fellow father, or even his own daddy that generates such warm emotions inside, it's a pimp! A man who gets his income from putting women out on street corners and everywhere else to sell sex. An unrighteous man is glorified for his power, fame and money in the 'hood.
Now let's just take a moment and blow that old school image of a pimp up--an archetype that has old fools acting like young pimps nowadays! Meanwhile, the marketing masterminds behind the scenes pimp the pimp, "Go get our money b*tch or else!" Now before you instruct me to watch my mouth, I could direct you to a few shows that ain't right from preacher pimps to baby daddy pimps and some of ya'll just love 'em, but I don't want to give them no more airtime then they have already received, now back to the pimped pimp who, like a wolf, comes in sheep's clothing with all his smooth talk, his crafty walk, kissing babies, sexing the ladies, making promises, and telling everyone, "You crazy, but I love you baby." Who could be mad at a nice pimp with a seemingly generous spirit about himself? But the discerning know better. Grandma use to take one long look at a few of my admirers back in the day and say, "Now that one there, he's full of sh*t! And that other one is no good! And could you have done better, he got some money?!"
A created character from way back when amplified by mass media, the pimp was like a puppet on strings for the government. And although he doesn't look like his past, the pimp still walks amongst us. A little more smarter these days because he completed highschool or maybe graduated from college, he can still get into places that the boys in blue can't and don't want to either. His yesteryear wardrobe was emulated by many dumb, ignorant or bored black men who were nothing more than walking targets that wore signs when they put on his attire, "I perform illegal services for the community! Take me off to jail." You couldn't miss them with all their bright colors.
Black folks back in the day, and blacks folks now, just don't think before they put on the clothing that is being directly marketed to them. Ask yourself this, "What are the designers that are splattered all over my shirts, pants, purses, wallets, shoes, and other things really representing? Am I someone's walking target?" Let's think long and hard about the ghetto wisdom I am sharing today. If you lived in a community of lack and you didn't have much going on besides a little sex here and there and a paycheck every two weeks, would the pimp be your form of escape from a dead end lifestyle? Could he move on your mind to want to try new things including white women?
Some of the black men were programmed by their so-called harmless TVs from the time they could watch TV. They were told by the pimp, "It's okay playa, you can have at least one white woman on your arm in your lifetime. Uncle Charlie won't hang you, you dig?" And that one, Snow White, could care less about her pimp, she was working out deals with non-blacks who wanted to see him go down! As long as Snow White's people accepted her back home, she always had a place of shelter. She was used until she couldn't be used no more for a bit of information about those criminally minded black folks in the hood and in corporate America. Meanwhile, Chocolate Drop would warn the pimp about Snow White until she grew weary of not being heard, the once loyal worker would eventually turn on him like a snake.
Snow White knew how to draw her pimp to The Man like a fish to a worm, it was too easy to be trusted, thanks to television programming. But when that hoe was all used up, she was reminded that when she started the mission she was white trash and when her job was complete she was white trash! Now stop for a moment, and think about some of these so-called relationships that are obviously not working, but seem to drag on, someone ain't it for just the cream, that's for sure. No respectable white man back in the '70s or even those today, who aren't fond of black folks, would even think about taking a black man's sloppy seconds, but a pimp will try anything at least once--just so long as it makes him money.
I will be the first to admit the pimp has a charming appeal. When I was born into this wicked world made up of male and female pimps, players and hustlers in the '70s, not only did I see pimps on TV, but in person too with their hats on and with their hats off later in life. Back then, a little girl with wide eyes, I was curious about the pimp, but not enough to be one of his hoes. But what I didn't plan on was all the programmed wannabe pimps in the world who glorified his lifestyle. These copycats were actors, average men with average lifestyles wishing to pimp a young lady out. But as I grew older, I recognized the farce in yet another created caricature for blacks. One more thing to distract us from the spiritual power within. A black man can't hear his inner oracle when he is being pimped by the pimp. The pimp can't hear or see his hoes for who they really are, another man's daughters, because he is too busy being pimped by the ones who created him. Think of other examples where this idealology plays a part. The worker and the manager, the wife and the husband, and the business man and his partners, get the picture. Pimps are everywhere folks!
A pimp is nothing more than a slave dressed in someone else's clown suit whether it is all decorated up with a tilted matching hat (notice his creators didn't dress him up in any respectable attire) or worn with a hood and sagging pants. A truly spiritually changed black man would think twice before admiring or acting like a pimp. If you trust your Holy Bible, Koran or whatever it is that you read for spiritual nourishment, then the wise words in it should be something that takes the pimp out of that head game he likes to play with the unenlightened ones. But those who could careless, continue to perpetuate the pimp archetype.
My brothers and sisters, this pimp mentality issue is a matter of the heart for some of you. No more warm, fuzzy feelings for the pimp. Turn shows off with him in it. Don't even sit with any man who wishes for the days when men slapped their women around. Avoid encouraging the ungodly men in your family to "...tell that story when you had all those women...and that one did..." Meanwhile, his wife is seated in the next room, have some respect!
Ask your God to change your mindset and those around you concerning the Pimp.
Rest in peace, to all those who thought big pimpin' was all 'dat!
Nicholl McGuire
While watching a scene on TV similar to the one described in real life, you look over at your older relative, the one who use to know a pimp or two from the '70s, and he has a stupid grin on his face with eyes glued on the screen. The only smile you have seen on his face all day. Yeah, he's across the room re-living his youth admiring a pimp, now re-read that last line. It's not a doctor, scholar, lawyer, teacher, preacher, fellow father, or even his own daddy that generates such warm emotions inside, it's a pimp! A man who gets his income from putting women out on street corners and everywhere else to sell sex. An unrighteous man is glorified for his power, fame and money in the 'hood.
Now let's just take a moment and blow that old school image of a pimp up--an archetype that has old fools acting like young pimps nowadays! Meanwhile, the marketing masterminds behind the scenes pimp the pimp, "Go get our money b*tch or else!" Now before you instruct me to watch my mouth, I could direct you to a few shows that ain't right from preacher pimps to baby daddy pimps and some of ya'll just love 'em, but I don't want to give them no more airtime then they have already received, now back to the pimped pimp who, like a wolf, comes in sheep's clothing with all his smooth talk, his crafty walk, kissing babies, sexing the ladies, making promises, and telling everyone, "You crazy, but I love you baby." Who could be mad at a nice pimp with a seemingly generous spirit about himself? But the discerning know better. Grandma use to take one long look at a few of my admirers back in the day and say, "Now that one there, he's full of sh*t! And that other one is no good! And could you have done better, he got some money?!"
A created character from way back when amplified by mass media, the pimp was like a puppet on strings for the government. And although he doesn't look like his past, the pimp still walks amongst us. A little more smarter these days because he completed highschool or maybe graduated from college, he can still get into places that the boys in blue can't and don't want to either. His yesteryear wardrobe was emulated by many dumb, ignorant or bored black men who were nothing more than walking targets that wore signs when they put on his attire, "I perform illegal services for the community! Take me off to jail." You couldn't miss them with all their bright colors.
Black folks back in the day, and blacks folks now, just don't think before they put on the clothing that is being directly marketed to them. Ask yourself this, "What are the designers that are splattered all over my shirts, pants, purses, wallets, shoes, and other things really representing? Am I someone's walking target?" Let's think long and hard about the ghetto wisdom I am sharing today. If you lived in a community of lack and you didn't have much going on besides a little sex here and there and a paycheck every two weeks, would the pimp be your form of escape from a dead end lifestyle? Could he move on your mind to want to try new things including white women?
Some of the black men were programmed by their so-called harmless TVs from the time they could watch TV. They were told by the pimp, "It's okay playa, you can have at least one white woman on your arm in your lifetime. Uncle Charlie won't hang you, you dig?" And that one, Snow White, could care less about her pimp, she was working out deals with non-blacks who wanted to see him go down! As long as Snow White's people accepted her back home, she always had a place of shelter. She was used until she couldn't be used no more for a bit of information about those criminally minded black folks in the hood and in corporate America. Meanwhile, Chocolate Drop would warn the pimp about Snow White until she grew weary of not being heard, the once loyal worker would eventually turn on him like a snake.
Snow White knew how to draw her pimp to The Man like a fish to a worm, it was too easy to be trusted, thanks to television programming. But when that hoe was all used up, she was reminded that when she started the mission she was white trash and when her job was complete she was white trash! Now stop for a moment, and think about some of these so-called relationships that are obviously not working, but seem to drag on, someone ain't it for just the cream, that's for sure. No respectable white man back in the '70s or even those today, who aren't fond of black folks, would even think about taking a black man's sloppy seconds, but a pimp will try anything at least once--just so long as it makes him money.
I will be the first to admit the pimp has a charming appeal. When I was born into this wicked world made up of male and female pimps, players and hustlers in the '70s, not only did I see pimps on TV, but in person too with their hats on and with their hats off later in life. Back then, a little girl with wide eyes, I was curious about the pimp, but not enough to be one of his hoes. But what I didn't plan on was all the programmed wannabe pimps in the world who glorified his lifestyle. These copycats were actors, average men with average lifestyles wishing to pimp a young lady out. But as I grew older, I recognized the farce in yet another created caricature for blacks. One more thing to distract us from the spiritual power within. A black man can't hear his inner oracle when he is being pimped by the pimp. The pimp can't hear or see his hoes for who they really are, another man's daughters, because he is too busy being pimped by the ones who created him. Think of other examples where this idealology plays a part. The worker and the manager, the wife and the husband, and the business man and his partners, get the picture. Pimps are everywhere folks!
A pimp is nothing more than a slave dressed in someone else's clown suit whether it is all decorated up with a tilted matching hat (notice his creators didn't dress him up in any respectable attire) or worn with a hood and sagging pants. A truly spiritually changed black man would think twice before admiring or acting like a pimp. If you trust your Holy Bible, Koran or whatever it is that you read for spiritual nourishment, then the wise words in it should be something that takes the pimp out of that head game he likes to play with the unenlightened ones. But those who could careless, continue to perpetuate the pimp archetype.
My brothers and sisters, this pimp mentality issue is a matter of the heart for some of you. No more warm, fuzzy feelings for the pimp. Turn shows off with him in it. Don't even sit with any man who wishes for the days when men slapped their women around. Avoid encouraging the ungodly men in your family to "...tell that story when you had all those women...and that one did..." Meanwhile, his wife is seated in the next room, have some respect!
Ask your God to change your mindset and those around you concerning the Pimp.
Rest in peace, to all those who thought big pimpin' was all 'dat!
Nicholl McGuire
Friday
Poem: My Black Ken
Alone you sit on the shelf,
the only one of your likeness
among many tan shades, blue eyes,
blond tresses, and smiling faces.
Your sistas stare at you
from across the room between
blonde strands of hair blowing
in your face.
They hope you take notice,
but you continue to look ahead
while wearing a plastic grin
and a plastic fro.
I've caught you every now and then
glancing at the tan Barbie Babes
and I moved you to a different spot.
Your sistas told me to make some room
for you near them, and I did.
But you kept falling over!
I would bend your legs,
support your back,
yet you would still fall!
So I moved you back among the Barbie Babes
and their you rested on their shoulders.
Nicholl McGuire
http://lovepoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
the only one of your likeness
among many tan shades, blue eyes,
blond tresses, and smiling faces.
Your sistas stare at you
from across the room between
blonde strands of hair blowing
in your face.
They hope you take notice,
but you continue to look ahead
while wearing a plastic grin
and a plastic fro.
I've caught you every now and then
glancing at the tan Barbie Babes
and I moved you to a different spot.
Your sistas told me to make some room
for you near them, and I did.
But you kept falling over!
I would bend your legs,
support your back,
yet you would still fall!
So I moved you back among the Barbie Babes
and their you rested on their shoulders.
Nicholl McGuire
http://lovepoemsbynicholl.blogspot.com
http://www.twitter.com/poemsbynicholl
Monday
Stress Management - High Blood Pressure and the African American Woman
I am an African-American woman who was born and raised in the south. My family, like many other southern families, idea of having a good meal is eating smothered pork chops, home made mashed potatoes with gravy, collard greens with ham hock and jiffy cornbread with butter on top. In the south, we love to eat the hog and all of its parts. Southerners are known for eating chitlings, pork ribs, chopped barbecue, ham sandwiches, pork sausage, and bacon.
Everything Good To You Is Not Good For You
My mother cooked and fed her children pork because her parents cooked and fed their family pork. My mother died from too much stress on her heart, as did her mother. They both had high blood pressure and they both died young. I am forty years of age and I have been diagnosed with high blood pressure. Do you see the pattern? Is this a pattern in your family as well?
Eat Healthy
The way that you can manage the stress that is being placed on your heart is by preventing it before it happens. When you eat fried foods and pork products you run the risk of clogging up the walls of your arteries. If your arteries are clogged with build up from grease then you are putting stress on your heart because your heart has to pump extra hard to get the blood to your vital organs. Managing stress starts with your diet by limiting the amount of pork, salt and fried foods that you intake and increasing the amount of fruits,vegetables, whole grains and fiber that you eat. Before you change your diet, you should consult with your doctor. There are also many books out there about healthy eating as it relates to African-American women.
Exercise
You can also reduce the amount of stress you place on your heart by exercising. Your heart is a muscle that is connected to valves which are connected to your arteries. When your heart is pumping blood it moves the valves and when you are inactive there is not enough blood flowing to keep your valves working properly. Walking for about 30 minutes a day is a great exercise for strengthening your heart and keeping your blood flowing properly. You should consult with your doctor before you start a new exercise regime.
Statics show that African American women have a high risk of being diagnosed with high blood pressure. High blood pressure is a disease that can be passed on from family to family but you can also have high blood pressure because of controllable variables such as being over weight, inactivity and having poor eating habits. High blood pressure is a silent killer and can lead to strokes and heart attacks. If you have not done so already, get you blood pressure checked and work on controlling the amount of stress that you place on your heart.
Antionette Tate enjoys helping people to discover their inner peace and joy. She invites you to visit her blog "Inner Peace and Joy: Tips to Help You Maintain Inner Peace and Joy Daily" http://howtohaveasuccessfulday.blogspot.com/ or email tonietate1@aol.com
Everything Good To You Is Not Good For You
My mother cooked and fed her children pork because her parents cooked and fed their family pork. My mother died from too much stress on her heart, as did her mother. They both had high blood pressure and they both died young. I am forty years of age and I have been diagnosed with high blood pressure. Do you see the pattern? Is this a pattern in your family as well?
Eat Healthy
The way that you can manage the stress that is being placed on your heart is by preventing it before it happens. When you eat fried foods and pork products you run the risk of clogging up the walls of your arteries. If your arteries are clogged with build up from grease then you are putting stress on your heart because your heart has to pump extra hard to get the blood to your vital organs. Managing stress starts with your diet by limiting the amount of pork, salt and fried foods that you intake and increasing the amount of fruits,vegetables, whole grains and fiber that you eat. Before you change your diet, you should consult with your doctor. There are also many books out there about healthy eating as it relates to African-American women.
Exercise
You can also reduce the amount of stress you place on your heart by exercising. Your heart is a muscle that is connected to valves which are connected to your arteries. When your heart is pumping blood it moves the valves and when you are inactive there is not enough blood flowing to keep your valves working properly. Walking for about 30 minutes a day is a great exercise for strengthening your heart and keeping your blood flowing properly. You should consult with your doctor before you start a new exercise regime.
Statics show that African American women have a high risk of being diagnosed with high blood pressure. High blood pressure is a disease that can be passed on from family to family but you can also have high blood pressure because of controllable variables such as being over weight, inactivity and having poor eating habits. High blood pressure is a silent killer and can lead to strokes and heart attacks. If you have not done so already, get you blood pressure checked and work on controlling the amount of stress that you place on your heart.
Antionette Tate enjoys helping people to discover their inner peace and joy. She invites you to visit her blog "Inner Peace and Joy: Tips to Help You Maintain Inner Peace and Joy Daily" http://howtohaveasuccessfulday.blogspot.com/ or email tonietate1@aol.com
The Best African American Dating Sites Are Not Very Hard to Find
Nowadays, there are a lot of African American dating sites available for African American single men and women all over the world that it's becoming a whole lot easier and convenient for the entire community. In fact, one of the most popular sites that is constantly growing in number with regards to its memberships is Cupid Online Dating's African American dating service. It has become so popular and well-liked by the African American community that it has experienced much active participation from its members. It is not only easy to use, but safe, fun, and secure that you can instantly find your match in just a click of a button.
But before signing up for a particular membership, here are some important reminders to take note of before joining a particular dating website:
The first thing you should take note of is how the website is done. Check if it is really organized, well-designed, and monitored actively by the administrators. If the website you've landed on has too many pornographic ads for example, it's best you leave that site and look for better ones online.
Next, check if the website requires you to pay for a membership. Though some websites do this for funding and maintenance, you have to consider the price of the membership and the payment method as well.
See if the personal profiles are personally done by real people and not by posers who only want to expand their dating service with numerous personal ads and profiles. See if the profiles contain unreadable characters or the info doesn't make sense.
But before signing up for a particular membership, here are some important reminders to take note of before joining a particular dating website:
The first thing you should take note of is how the website is done. Check if it is really organized, well-designed, and monitored actively by the administrators. If the website you've landed on has too many pornographic ads for example, it's best you leave that site and look for better ones online.
Next, check if the website requires you to pay for a membership. Though some websites do this for funding and maintenance, you have to consider the price of the membership and the payment method as well.
See if the personal profiles are personally done by real people and not by posers who only want to expand their dating service with numerous personal ads and profiles. See if the profiles contain unreadable characters or the info doesn't make sense.
Friday
African American Marriages and Relationships Need a Lifeline
Historically the African American community has struggled with sustaining longevity and commitment to marriage. It's dutifully noted in numerous writings and teachings that slavery embedded a crippling blow to the African American community, a crack so precipitous that the African American family is faintly progressing, if at all. African American relationships need a lifeline.
Recent studies state Black women, in sum, are less likely to marry, stay married, and remarry. Those who marry do so at an older age than do whites. The differences between blacks and whites are greater than they were a generation ago. As a result, black women spend far less of their life in a marriage than do white women. White women now can expect to spend less than half of their lives married. But among black women, the corresponding figure has plunged from 40 percent to 22 percent - about the same proportion of life that the average college-educated person spends attending school. Marriage has become just a temporary stage of life for blacks, preceded by a lengthening period of single-hood and followed by a long period of living without a spouse. For blacks, even more so than for whites, a long, stable marriage is the exception rather than the rule. (Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage).
Why is it that more African American couples do not seek external support to salvage or improve their marriages or relationships? As resilient as African Americans are, there is often little resilience in regard to protecting and developing a marriage. Often other cultures will survive marital struggles and relationship conflict due to the practice and support of counseling, coaching, or even therapy if necessary. Arguably, other cultures seem to understand the value of open mindedness and the benefits of utilizing external avenues of support to assist with sustaining a healthy marriage, and relationship enhancement.
African American couples far too often rely on the "church" for direction and advice regarding marital and relationship support. Couples seeking support from the church is a positive option indeed, however, the church often offers a one dimensional view of "working things out" and often this support mostly prayer and scripture prayer. Well, prayer is good, but along with prayer there needs to be reinforcement and direction on various key elements of a relationship i.e., such as stronger and more effective communication between two people. In addition, there should be a re-evaluation of values and belief systems of the two committed individuals to determine if these values and beliefs are still in alignment or if they ever were.
Failure to understand your partner's beliefs and values is the key contributor to conflict in relationships. Prayer is ineffective without action to compliment it. Couples must understand what these actions entail and what steps can be taken as a unit, to effectively achieve each step in which will lead them to their shared goals within their relationship. Yes, prayer does change things but, the right actions helps things stay changed.
Lastly, the African American male has to step down from his egotistical thrown and stop believing that he or his relationship does not need the support of progressive tools and services that are in place to enhance him and his relationship. The notion of "I'm a man and I don't need anyone to tell me how to run my house" needs to be relinquished. Coaching, neither Counseling nor Therapy is services designed to neither deduce the authority of any man or woman nor dictate how a household should be run. These services are in place for positive and progressive growth and personal development individually as well as with a partner. This egotistical mindset is apart of the stifling problem that continues to cripple and contribute to the increasing percentages of divorce in the African-American community, increasing percentages of single black women, and the disparity of what an appropriate vision of black marriage should look like.
I'm not saying that this is the soul reason for the break down in relationships in the African American community. However, I am arguing that the African-American community as it pertains to marriage and relationships needs a lifeline. There are a variety of support services that are available to African Americans just as these services are available to other ethnicity as well. The difference is the other cultures exercise them regularly and often successfully. It is baffling to understand how the mental and physical energy easily dedicated towards various miscellaneous activities and tangible material things can be exerted effortlessly and without a second guess in the African-American household. However, often when the opportunity for personal growth is realized or if a marriage is on the brink of separation or divorce, it is effortlessly released without the same mental and physical energy or passion that is exuded towards other matters. The greatest investment is the investment in self; arguably this "investment" holds little value in the African-American home.
African American marriages and relationships need a lifeline; please share your services, your knowledge and wisdom with as many people as you can. Do not just attempt to "sell" them a service or product- offer them the value of personal development, stronger unity and the vision of a better future for themselves and their families.
Shelby Hill
Recent studies state Black women, in sum, are less likely to marry, stay married, and remarry. Those who marry do so at an older age than do whites. The differences between blacks and whites are greater than they were a generation ago. As a result, black women spend far less of their life in a marriage than do white women. White women now can expect to spend less than half of their lives married. But among black women, the corresponding figure has plunged from 40 percent to 22 percent - about the same proportion of life that the average college-educated person spends attending school. Marriage has become just a temporary stage of life for blacks, preceded by a lengthening period of single-hood and followed by a long period of living without a spouse. For blacks, even more so than for whites, a long, stable marriage is the exception rather than the rule. (Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage).
Why is it that more African American couples do not seek external support to salvage or improve their marriages or relationships? As resilient as African Americans are, there is often little resilience in regard to protecting and developing a marriage. Often other cultures will survive marital struggles and relationship conflict due to the practice and support of counseling, coaching, or even therapy if necessary. Arguably, other cultures seem to understand the value of open mindedness and the benefits of utilizing external avenues of support to assist with sustaining a healthy marriage, and relationship enhancement.
African American couples far too often rely on the "church" for direction and advice regarding marital and relationship support. Couples seeking support from the church is a positive option indeed, however, the church often offers a one dimensional view of "working things out" and often this support mostly prayer and scripture prayer. Well, prayer is good, but along with prayer there needs to be reinforcement and direction on various key elements of a relationship i.e., such as stronger and more effective communication between two people. In addition, there should be a re-evaluation of values and belief systems of the two committed individuals to determine if these values and beliefs are still in alignment or if they ever were.
Failure to understand your partner's beliefs and values is the key contributor to conflict in relationships. Prayer is ineffective without action to compliment it. Couples must understand what these actions entail and what steps can be taken as a unit, to effectively achieve each step in which will lead them to their shared goals within their relationship. Yes, prayer does change things but, the right actions helps things stay changed.
Lastly, the African American male has to step down from his egotistical thrown and stop believing that he or his relationship does not need the support of progressive tools and services that are in place to enhance him and his relationship. The notion of "I'm a man and I don't need anyone to tell me how to run my house" needs to be relinquished. Coaching, neither Counseling nor Therapy is services designed to neither deduce the authority of any man or woman nor dictate how a household should be run. These services are in place for positive and progressive growth and personal development individually as well as with a partner. This egotistical mindset is apart of the stifling problem that continues to cripple and contribute to the increasing percentages of divorce in the African-American community, increasing percentages of single black women, and the disparity of what an appropriate vision of black marriage should look like.
I'm not saying that this is the soul reason for the break down in relationships in the African American community. However, I am arguing that the African-American community as it pertains to marriage and relationships needs a lifeline. There are a variety of support services that are available to African Americans just as these services are available to other ethnicity as well. The difference is the other cultures exercise them regularly and often successfully. It is baffling to understand how the mental and physical energy easily dedicated towards various miscellaneous activities and tangible material things can be exerted effortlessly and without a second guess in the African-American household. However, often when the opportunity for personal growth is realized or if a marriage is on the brink of separation or divorce, it is effortlessly released without the same mental and physical energy or passion that is exuded towards other matters. The greatest investment is the investment in self; arguably this "investment" holds little value in the African-American home.
African American marriages and relationships need a lifeline; please share your services, your knowledge and wisdom with as many people as you can. Do not just attempt to "sell" them a service or product- offer them the value of personal development, stronger unity and the vision of a better future for themselves and their families.
Shelby Hill
Wednesday
Are You Fake or Ghetto?
If I see another young ignorant black female look me up and down without me even opening my mouth up, I think I'll scream! What is wrong with these ghetto girls? Have they no class? Oh that's right we are living in an era where keeping it real is supposed to be cool, acting ghetto is hip and so forth. Anything outside of that is fake. Kind of funny when those who are supposed to be "keeping it real" wear fake hair, eyelashes, nails, gold, designer bags, and so on!
Let me share my story. I attended a house gathering. I was already seated at a table when she walked in, she saw me before her man did and there she was checking me out. I smiled, waved my hand, even said, "Hello." She barely said, "Hi." I knew right away, she wasn't my kind. That's right, I said it, "my kind," because my kind isn't going to suck teeth, roll eyes, and show her cards before she sits at the table!
You see, we all have cards we play whether literally or metaphorically speaking. The ones I'm speaking about are related to one's personality. The cards being the attitude, thoughts and behaviors. I use the example of a card game. There are the playing cards you try very hard to not allow anyone to see until you know you are ready to show them in the hopes of winning the game. Too many sistas show their hands (as well as everything else) all the while thinking "I'm cute" with no objective. One old fool told me years ago, during our first meeting, barely knowing me, "You are one of them that think your cute." I was floored, "What? You don't even know me I told her." She said, "That's what I thought before I got to know you. You alright, I guess." When I thought about her words while looking at the woman seated near me, I realized she showed the cards in her hand. A darker skin woman with a complex about lighter skin hues with long hair, I thought. Well, you know she quickly went on my list of those who just "ain't" my kind of people.
So back to the house gathering, on another occasion I spoke to another eye bouncing, insecure woman, who this time didn't have a man who she could worry about, and she too quickly looked to the left and then to the right and back again at me barely saying an audible, "Hi." She was a light hue like me, so I thought skin tone most likely isn't the issue she has with me, I wonder what's her story? So I sat back and watched her, because at some point I knew, she like the other insecure women I have encountered in the past, would play her hand too! So I spoke about an issue that was non-related to my observation (you see I'm not showing my hand) to a room full of women. I watched her reaction to me, she was shifting around looking as if she was trying real hard to ignore me. What I said was a noncontroversial thought directed at someone in the group, I wasn't long winded with what I said, I figured that the eye rolling woman was just doing what she does best being insecure, but then the thought came to me, she, being younger, probably thinks I talk white, is being fake, or some other ignorant thought young women think about when observing older women who look and speak better than them! It wasn't long before I noticed that she was "the type." The type who hadn't been around many women who spoke intelligently. I recognized that same reaction from other young women like her in the past. If these women knew any better they would know, there are experiences one has when he or she attends college that molds and shapes some more than others (ask President Barak Obama and his wife Michelle.) Most educated people have a demeanor that is very different than uneducated ones. It is often misconstrued for being fake or "acting white." I would say for some, whether educated in a college, trade school or self-educated, they aren't being fake, maybe out of touch even weird, but not fake! To be fake is to be something you are not, but when you are what you are you will walk it and talk it. A person with a higher education walks and talks differently than one who doesn't. Does it make them better than the next woman or man in personality or in spirit? No. But there is a good chance, that he or she will do better academically, but I digress.
So here I am with more life experiences to add to my School of Hard Knocks education. I have to defend myself from haters (a street term used to define people who are jealous of others.) I sometimes feel that I have to prove that I am not fake; however, I will not resort to acting ghetto to prove a point! Acting ghetto is like saying a bad word, it just comes out you don't have to work on it! There isn't much effort needed in that department for me!
Written by Nicholl McGuire
http://nichollmcguire.blogspot.com
Let me share my story. I attended a house gathering. I was already seated at a table when she walked in, she saw me before her man did and there she was checking me out. I smiled, waved my hand, even said, "Hello." She barely said, "Hi." I knew right away, she wasn't my kind. That's right, I said it, "my kind," because my kind isn't going to suck teeth, roll eyes, and show her cards before she sits at the table!
You see, we all have cards we play whether literally or metaphorically speaking. The ones I'm speaking about are related to one's personality. The cards being the attitude, thoughts and behaviors. I use the example of a card game. There are the playing cards you try very hard to not allow anyone to see until you know you are ready to show them in the hopes of winning the game. Too many sistas show their hands (as well as everything else) all the while thinking "I'm cute" with no objective. One old fool told me years ago, during our first meeting, barely knowing me, "You are one of them that think your cute." I was floored, "What? You don't even know me I told her." She said, "That's what I thought before I got to know you. You alright, I guess." When I thought about her words while looking at the woman seated near me, I realized she showed the cards in her hand. A darker skin woman with a complex about lighter skin hues with long hair, I thought. Well, you know she quickly went on my list of those who just "ain't" my kind of people.
So back to the house gathering, on another occasion I spoke to another eye bouncing, insecure woman, who this time didn't have a man who she could worry about, and she too quickly looked to the left and then to the right and back again at me barely saying an audible, "Hi." She was a light hue like me, so I thought skin tone most likely isn't the issue she has with me, I wonder what's her story? So I sat back and watched her, because at some point I knew, she like the other insecure women I have encountered in the past, would play her hand too! So I spoke about an issue that was non-related to my observation (you see I'm not showing my hand) to a room full of women. I watched her reaction to me, she was shifting around looking as if she was trying real hard to ignore me. What I said was a noncontroversial thought directed at someone in the group, I wasn't long winded with what I said, I figured that the eye rolling woman was just doing what she does best being insecure, but then the thought came to me, she, being younger, probably thinks I talk white, is being fake, or some other ignorant thought young women think about when observing older women who look and speak better than them! It wasn't long before I noticed that she was "the type." The type who hadn't been around many women who spoke intelligently. I recognized that same reaction from other young women like her in the past. If these women knew any better they would know, there are experiences one has when he or she attends college that molds and shapes some more than others (ask President Barak Obama and his wife Michelle.) Most educated people have a demeanor that is very different than uneducated ones. It is often misconstrued for being fake or "acting white." I would say for some, whether educated in a college, trade school or self-educated, they aren't being fake, maybe out of touch even weird, but not fake! To be fake is to be something you are not, but when you are what you are you will walk it and talk it. A person with a higher education walks and talks differently than one who doesn't. Does it make them better than the next woman or man in personality or in spirit? No. But there is a good chance, that he or she will do better academically, but I digress.
So here I am with more life experiences to add to my School of Hard Knocks education. I have to defend myself from haters (a street term used to define people who are jealous of others.) I sometimes feel that I have to prove that I am not fake; however, I will not resort to acting ghetto to prove a point! Acting ghetto is like saying a bad word, it just comes out you don't have to work on it! There isn't much effort needed in that department for me!
Written by Nicholl McGuire
http://nichollmcguire.blogspot.com
Is It A Fact That African American Men At More Risk From Prostate Cancer Than White Men?
Statistics show that African American men are at greater risk of dying from prostate cancer than white men and the majority of statisticians agree that the risk in the case of black men is approximately two and a half times that of white men. But, are these statistics misleading?
The answer might come from a study conducted not long ago in North Carolina. The study involved some 253 white men and 84 black men between the ages of 40 and 75 who were diagnosed with prostate cancer between 2001 and 2004.
The study examined a number of factors including employment, screening history, access to care, symptoms, the existence of other medical conditions, attitudes towards health care and health care providers, family history, treatment, income and whether or not the men had health insurance.
The study discovered that 55 percent of the black men earned under $40,000 annually in comparison to to 23 percent for white men. The study also showed that black men were more likely to be educated to a lower standard, to have a blue-collar job, to have co-existing medical problems and to be unemployed as a result of illness or disability.
In addition the study showed that just 3 percent of white men did not have medical insurance, in comparison to 8 percent of black men and that just over 30 percent of white men has some type of supplemental Medicare coverage, in comparison to 17 percent of black men.
One especially interesting finding was the fact that both groups were well informed about the risks of prostrate cancer and the requirement for treatment, although the black men accepted greater responsibility for their own health and were less likely to trust their doctors. In fact many of the black men said that they were mistrustful of their doctors and felt that any advice given was more likely to be influenced by the cost of treatment than patient needs.
On the important question of screening, black men were less likely to have regular check-ups, digital rectal examinations or prostate specific antigen (PSA) tests. It was also interesting to note that the study reported that black men were more than twice as likely to have to request a PSA test than white men.
The study makes it clear that there is a marked different between the two groups which lies in the lack of early detection in black men and that this arises to a large degree from the fact that they do not have established relationships with their doctors, have poor access to affordable and convenient care and do not carry adequate health insurance.
Obviously it is not easy to assign numbers to a study of this nature and further, and bigger, studies need to be conducted to quantify the differences between black men and white men. Nevertheless, it would seem that much of the difference does not stem from the fact that black men are more likely to develop prostate cancer but lies in the fact that they are more likely to die as a result of the disease because of its late detection.
If the gap between black men and white men in terms of the provision of healthcare were closed the figures could well look quite different.
By Donald Saunders
ProstateProblemCenter.com provides information on many aspects of prostate cancer including prostate cancer treatment and the therapeutic use of prostate milking
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African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at africanamericanplanet.blogspot.com.
