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Thursday

On Venting About Your Own Ethnicity

"What goes on at home, stays at home," some of you reading this remember what your parents told you, and you went running off the mouth anyway. "I don't care what they said," the rebellious teen exclaims. "Daddy just don't want me to say nothing because he knows what he's been doing...Mama just don't want grandma to know because she won't give her anything." Oh, don't we remember the things our parents and grandparents told us to keep silent about when it comes to what goes on at home. "This is my house...and until you pay the bills, you don't have sh*t to say!" A beaten down disgruntled teen often told to, "Stay in a child's place" grows up to be a big mouth adult venting about everyone including his own people. (I'm a witness!)

I've heard black celebrity entertainers in mainstream media mouthing off about one another's projects and negatively labeling this one and that one's work (as if there is a whole lot of black people running the entertainment industries, yeah right!?) I understand we live in a world of free speech, but some things are better left unsaid and if you must say it, do it behind closed doors. But what do our people do especially when they become successful, they tell the world everything about us including how much they don't like someone. They run off the mouth about what happened in the past, the present and go so far as to predict someone else's future. To make matters worse, they hate on one another right before non-blacks.

These "other" races like that "kind of carrying on" (I borrowed that line from my grandma) which means drama, hoopla, and/or craziness. As long as you aren't talking about them negatively, they are okay with you. So how does the sell-out black reaffirm his allegiance to the man? He not only vents, but he shares personal information about his own people specifically tailored to get someone demoted, fired, scandalized or anything else that affects his paper!

Go ahead, talk about your people with "them." Laugh it up. "Well you know blacks can be a bit emotional...sensitive...my friend is ghetto..." Does it make you feel good especially when they start feeling comfortable around you to add their two cents worth? It's funny because these same people who are moving up the ladder on the backs of "us" and "they" will come back around needing us when non-blacks no longer see that money rolling in like they once did.

Whether you are working amongst non-blacks in a small community or in corporate America, when you show that you don't have any allegiance to anyone, people will be more likely to befriend you even blacks who don't particularly like their own people too. They know that you are not a threat, you are "so-called" fair. There's nothing wrong with being fair as long as you are consistent. But when you are deliberately siding with non-blacks to win favor with them by talking about your own people, you have issues and you don't need a psychologist to tell you that usually there are other actions that some will do that tell the world, "I don't do my people." However, deep inside the heart of any black person that has been slighted by someone of another race, you have to know that some things just can't be said about you or those around you who are black. You have to realize that rebuking your brother before an audience of non-blacks is going to backfire sooner or later.

It's funny because the same people who don't want you to favor your own people, will question your loyalty, compassion, and other things that make up the human spirit. Behind closed doors they are talking to their friends saying, "Can we even trust this guy? I mean listen to how he speaks about his own people."

Some of the most dangerous blacks aren't the ones who carry a pistol around, but the ones who can cut a fellow brother or sister without blinking with their words. Then leave him or her bleeding to death while cashing in on his or her demise (that's cold.) But I tell you, I have seen some well-to-do blacks do just that with mere words and I don't trust them like I would my poor sister or brother in Christ. There has to be some degree of balance when dealing with an evil brother or sister and it doesn't have to be out on the street for all to see.

Peace.

Nicholl McGuire
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African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at africanamericanplanet.blogspot.com.

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