Blogger Tips and TricksLatest Tips And TricksBlogger Tricks


This site was created by Nicholl McGuire, Inspirational Speaker and Author. Feel free to comment, share links and subscribe. If you have a business or would like to guest post feel free to contact. Check out topics on this blog and select what interests you. They are found at the bottom of this page. Peace and Love.


Do You Really Know What it Means to Love?

I have seen my share of so-called "love" amongst our people and it has long been suffocated with  dollar bills and service, so much so that what appears to look like love, looks more like abuse.

I have to admit, where I saw love demonstrated best wasn't with my own people during my youthful years when I actually paid attention to adults--I had to move away to know better.  In time, I learned about various forms of love.  There was tough love, agape love, romantic love, true love, etc.  These unfamiliar folks I came in contact with weren't perfect, didn't always know when I was observing and taking note, but knew that there was something about me that was different; therefore, many didn't mind showing me some love.  Rather than fight me on differences, they received me.  It was then, that I welcomed my first lesson on love as a young adult:  one must be willing to receive another, with flaws and all, in order to honestly say that he or she loves that person.  When I came back home to my struggling small town that had many streets stained with the blood of youth, I shared what I learned, not with everyone, but those willing to embrace love.

Too often we have users and abusers in our family and in our extended circles that simply don't know what it means to love.  They know how to ask you to do things and sit back and wait for you to meet needs, but love?  These individuals may even claim, "I love you..." but do they really?  What happens when you drop the ball--don't meet expectations?  They fall out of love with you, but did they honestly ever love you? 

I have experienced most of my life, outside of family, lust not sincere love.  Some men who "lusted" me didn't think too much of me once I showed that not only am I a body, but mind and spirit too.  Their lust was evident in the way that they looked at me.  They noticed my walk, my talk, and looked for signs on what I could do to prosper their pockets, but love?  Not hardly!  When I spoke truth, they rejected me almost as quickly as they said, "I love you...need you...want you baby."  They knew rejection; therefore, they knew how to reject.

Love is a foreign word to those who haven't been shown love. They merely act but know not love.  Some refuse to improve themselves so that they can truly experience love and appreciate others.  They are forever saying, "I know..." something, but they are walking in truth--in love.  So they go from partner to partner, business to business never honestly loving anything.  They talk a good game, but they don't love the game.  Oftentimes, a prideful people is more concerned about how they look, what they eat and where they go then whether or not they sincerely love self or others.  They don't revel in quality times, far too busy looking at wrist watches and what someone looks like to enjoy an atmosphere while appreciating one's very existence for being in that environment where love emanates.
How much more enlightened would a man or woman be on matters of the heart if he or she knew love more than war?

Attempt to get your parent, partner, friend or someone else to start talking about love.  What is his or her take on it?  Notice the mannerisms as he or she speaks.  Listen to your loved one's definition.  Does what this person say match his or her actions or reactions to your thoughts on the subject matter?  If he or she digresses or talks over you, this is a good indication how shallow one's love is for you.  True love gives and takes.

Some will look to the biblical definition of love found in Corinthians 13, others will use their deeds and what others has done for them to define love, but the truth is love comes from deep within.  If you have yet to experience love, you might want to check your reaction to people first.  How do you respond to self, family and others when your body cries out for attention, when they come around you, or when you go to them?  What type of conversation or lack thereof are you bringing to that one you claim to love? 

Love is action!  If I am not talking to you about anything of substance every now and again, if I don't emotionally or physically respond to your needs whether you ask or not whether you like me that day or not, if I act as if I don't care about what you say or where you are going, then do I sincerely love you?

We live in a world that is easily irritated and impatient with one another.  Sometimes we keep track of wrongs committed against us and look to pay people back. Other times we don't think to help or encourage others.  With negativity going on within us from one day to the next, it isn't any wonder why it is a challenge to love a partner, friend or enemy.  If I don't love who I am or the I AM of wisdom, then how can I love you?

We must recognize love, experience it, embrace it when it comes.  Our people must learn to close up that motor mouth inside our heads that says, "Now what does he want now?  Why is she coming over here in my space?  What are these kids going to ask of me next?  That group knows I hate them, why do they want to be bothered with me?"  When we start shutting that mouth up within and around, who knows what your marriage might look like a year from now, what prosperity awaits, what friendship might open up doors, or what a heavenly God might do for you and you for Him.  But if we don't permit love to operate--to allow optimism to take over, to look on the bright side, to think higher than ourselves, and to respect and utilize wisdom, then watch life change, not for the better, but for the worse.

Do you really know what it means to love?

Nicholl McGuire author of Laboring to Love Myself

No comments:

Pin Us!

Black Business Women Online

Join Nicholl at the Black Business Women Online Site here.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...


African American Planet Blog Topics

african american spirituality african american relationships african american celebrities african american family poems african american men african american parents spiritual african americans black music african american women manipulative media money relationships white american racism african american be encouraged dating black history family issues african american hairstyles african american poets Barack Obama african american achievers african american business african american mothers african american thoughts african american health issues black history month racism abuse african american music domestic violence education gospel music african american churches african american documentaries african american history african american lifestyle african american movies american holidays narcissism africa african american dating african american friendships african american scholarships black women first black president interracial relationships not african american self hate soul food white people african american bloggers african american children african american entertainment african american fathers african american travel black business blog owner ghetto slavery african american christian women african american christians african american education african american elite african american haircare african american leaders african american news angry black man angry black woman freemasons mind control shopping spiritual warfare african american authors african american books african american culture african american museums african american skin care african american writers ancestry black american racism black celebrities black celebrity masons black love black skin cheating civil rights ignorant black people martin luther king barack obama mental issues about us absent fathers african american deceivers african american inventors african american marriages african american media african american statistics african american television networks african american workers african americans and africans angry blacks black grandmothers dark skin death fraternal organizations friendships illuminati prejudice president barack obama rb music groups religion sex travel abusive women african american communities african american magazines african american occult african american preachers african american speakers african american wigs african americans workplace angry black women black american ignorance black education black greek organizations black panthers party black preachers black racists black singles blacks with an attitude celebrities and god crazy blacks funny stuff hip hop culture jealous women love michael jackson natural disasters obama campaign postpartum depression president elect barack obama racial problems racist republicans secret societies unemployment voter privacy youtubers Obama a abusive men african american art african american audio books african american beauty african american brothers african american community african american cuisine african american dating sites african american dining african american drama african american genealogy african american hair loss african american heritage african american holidays african american home owners african american homosexuality african american idols african american lawyers african american mental illness african american music videos african american natural hair african american political prisoners african american religion african american researchers african american russia african american self-hate african american sex african american soldiers african american toys african american voters african americans jail african consciousness aunt tammy big girls biracial people black athletes black dating services black inventors black men and white women black people attitude black stereotypes blessings and curses boule brainwashed blacks children activities chris brown controlling black folks controlling men controlling women difficult people down low celebrities faith fema camps financial assistance funny black people gay black men gossip government homosexuals internet dating laboring to love an abusive mate liars light skin lottery menopause military music videos obese black people old school pedophilia positivity post traumatic slave syndrome poverty prayers schizophrenia self esteem senator barack obama skin bleaching sports surveys twitter uncle tom whistleblowers African American parade African American producers African American women in science Haiti Obama sworn in abortion affirmative action african american bookstores african american chinese african american clothing styles african american drug dealers african american gamers african american gifts african american girls african american gods african american grandparents african american grants african american heterosexuality african american korea african american latin america african american ministers african american models african american online surfing african american opinion african american paintings african american photographers african american photography african american police officers african american population control african american prostitution african american radio shows african american samoan african american singles african american skincare african american sons african american studies african american thinking african american tips african american transhumanists african american weaves african american women groups african american women inventors african american women makeup african americans respect african americans workers african art african decor african food african history anger management angry atlanta bisexual black men black English people black alliance for just immigration black american quotations black art websites black attitudes black celebrity children black cinema black conscious community black conscious women black dolls black elite groups black feminists black leadership black men black national anthem black nationalism black people and summer time black population control black radio stations black scholars black sitcoms black toys boxer break ups childhood childless women chris rock christina milian civil war classic black movies classism cold-blooded african americans colorism communication community assistance confrontation construction in haiti constructive criticism counselors dating violence deceased black legends depression diversity eastern stars ebola educated blacks effeminate african american men elderly black folks employment eugenics exes false flags fat african americans fearful blacks food stamps fools free stuff french african funny african americans funny black man funny black woman generational curses gifted african americans going green good black men haiti earthquake haiti fault line happiness harlem helpful links hidden medical experiments high blood pressure highly sensitive blacks hip hop fashion hip hop satanism honest black folk housing assistance how to approach a black woman how to get exposure on this site hurricane relief insecure women internet israel jamaicans jealous men juneteenth keep it real kwanzaa loud mouth blacks lynching malcom x manhood manmade earthquakes memorial day michael jackson children mother michelle obama mike tyson mike tyson daughter minority women scholarships misogyny moors motivation multiracial celebrities music lyrics negro spirituals nelson mandela nicole richie nonblack offended blacks overweight african americans paranoid patience patti labelle paula abdul perimenopause police poor african americans population control prideful prostate cancer and black men reality shows recycling relatives reprobate mind revenge reverse discrimination rhianna rich african americans samples and trials scary blacks self righteous sexual harassment siblings skull and bones slow jams social issues social networking sociopaths sometimey black folks strange black folks superstition terri seymore the man tired black man tired black woman trends unemotional ungrateful black folks voodoo war white perspective on african american issues wisdom women friends work at home

Dating Advice, Relationship Problems?

Dating Advice, Relationship Problems?
Like this blog? Check this one out too!

Blog Dash

African American View on You Blogger/Owner

African American Planet Blog

African American Planet Blog
Writer, Poet, Author, Speaker, Virtual Assistant Nicholl McGuire
Creative Commons License
African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.


This content is not yet available over encrypted connections.