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This site was created by Nicholl McGuire, Inspirational Speaker and Author. Feel free to comment, share links and subscribe. If you have a business or would like to guest post feel free to contact. Check out topics on this blog and select what interests you. They are found at the bottom of this page. Peace and Love.

Sunday

You Just Don't Listen...Leave Your Troubled Relatives Alone Online, Offline

Some of our people just love to talk about folks especially when they are down.  They enjoy getting on the Internet, surfing on various social networking sites and leaving unflattering comments/questions/suggestions.  If you don't deal with your troubled relatives offline, why do you bother with them online?

You have the liars, angry, and wild people you know who are your least favorite.  You compromise, call yourself being "nice," "Christ-like" or "kind" for reaching out and touching someone.  But can I tell you from personal experience, you can be all-forgiving, sweet and compassionate only to find yourself wishing you never reconnected or met certain people.  Their old ways show up and your old feelings arise and before long you remember why you didn't deal with those messed up folks.

In many black families, we have what you would call, codependents.  People who have dysfunctional relationships with loved ones they are supposed to be helping yet they will give them money when they know they have addictions, make excuses for their mental illnesses, encourage them to act immature, irresponsible, etc.  They claim they are "being there" for these folks when some know differently.  Then when these loved ones act up, they bad-mouth, lie, exaggerate, blame, and do other things knowing full well they are part of the reason why their relatives' don't get any better.  Did they ever want to help anyone out to begin with?  Rather than listen to gossip and complaints or even contribute one's negative personal opinion or observation on the madness, call relatives out on their foolishness!

When the writing is on the wall, that one simply is not going to achieve the desired relationship, benefits, results, etc. with some loved ones, its time to put them in the hands of professionals, create distance, and be concerned about your own life.  Connecting and/or reconnecting with toxic people will do nothing more than stress you out!  God has made your burdens light for a reason, so be grateful when your life isn't busy, a bit slow, and quiet.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Tell Me Mother You're Sorry and other books.
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African American Planet: Relationships, Education, Products & Lifestyle by Nicholl McGuire is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at africanamericanplanet.blogspot.com.

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